The person I’ve become, with them

by Mir on November 21, 2011 in It's not a regret, it's an "experience", Offspring: ecstasy and agony

It’s true that there’s a fine tradition of endless taunting that happens in our family, and I consider it something of a character-building exercise, sure, and my children endure it with a mixture of rolled eyes and exasperation, yes, but the truth is that I am ribbing myself as much as I’m ribbing them. There are times I feel like I’ve stepped into a music video because I’m not entirely sure how I ended up here.

And it’s mostly due to the kids. Not entirely, of course, but yeah, mostly. They change things. If I find myself uttering the phrase “I never thought I’d…” chances are, it’s going to be followed by something having to do with a person who once made my belly button pop out like a turkey timer.

This week feels especially rife with that sort of thing, for some reason. I’m not entirely sure why. I just know that it keeps happening. (more…)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 31 }

My heart disappeared

by Mir on November 19, 2011 in Oh look! Something furry!!

Yesterday was the last day of Hippie School for an entire WEEK, because it turns out that hippies take their vacation breaks pretty seriously. The kids had already had a wild field trip day on Thursday, so yesterday was more of a “regular” day. As I puttered around my office yesterday afternoon, I thought that I might finally grant one of Monkey’s most fervent wishes.

“Why don’t you ever bring Licorice when you pick me up??” he always demands, as if I am specifically leaving the dog at home to agitate him. The truth is that due to our carpool arrangements, I only do pickup a couple of times a week, and as there is 1) already a dog at Hippie School (because OF COURSE THERE IS) and 2) pick-up time is complete mayhem and 3) Licorice is already kind of neurotic, it has just never seemed like a good idea.

But yesterday was the last day before vacation, so I figured: What the heck! I finished what I was doing, then grabbed the leash and went out on the porch to call the dog. (more…)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 29 }

5-inch-stiletto-in-mouth syndrome

by Mir on November 18, 2011 in Haven't been hit by lightning yet!

Last night was an extremely auspicious occasion. For the first time EVER, Otto and I went out for the evening and left the kids to make their own dinner, finish their homework, and put themselves to bed. ON A SCHOOL NIGHT. (Not that we’ve ever done it on a weekend, either, come to think of it. But doing this on a school night seemed particularly weird, somehow.) The fact of the matter is that they’re plenty old enough, I am just overprotective and also once Chickadee almost burned the house down with a lamp (reading after hours! my little nerdling!) (the house wasn’t really almost burned down, but she did burn a circle on her headboard), so leaving them alone with the oven on felt like a leap of faith. (Chickadee: “Don’t worry! I’m sure the pizza only needs three hours or so! KIDDING!”)

Anyway, it was time for another Fancy Shindig because my husband’s employer likes to have these things. So we gussied up and headed out, making the children promise to call 911 if anything caught on fire while we were gone.

I wore my new(ish) platform stilettos, which caused Monkey to say, “Whoa. You are REALLY tall now!” I had to promise it was temporary before we left. (more…)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 35 }

Winging it

by Mir on November 16, 2011 in Offspring: ecstasy and agony

There’s so much more I want to say about yesterday’s post, about this situation in specific and our society’s willingness to explain away predatory and aggressive behavior as something else, surely, he didn’t MEAN it that way and he would NEVER and by the way, what exactly was she wearing, hmmmm? But that will become a rant that never ends, in general; and in specific, I have pledged to sit on my hands until a satisfactory resolution is reached.

[I shared some of your comments here and from over on Off Our Chests with Chickie, by the way, and she was really surprised, I think, by the outpouring of support. (Which is a whole 'nother level of sad to this whole thing, but...) Thank you so much.]

I may have had a hubris-filled moment, in the last few days, when I said to Otto SHE IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE EASY ONE. He may still be laughing at me.

And I probably deserve it. (more…)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 38 }

Mama Bear ANGRY

by Mir on November 15, 2011 in My name is Grumplestiltskin, Offspring: ecstasy and agony

Yesterday I was crazed, swamped with work I’d put off all weekend, trying to carve out a spot in the afternoon to write here. Because although I write for a living, writing HERE is what keeps me sane and grounded (despite periodic exclamation-point-riddled evidence to the contrary).

But then my work day got cut short, because Chickadee—who has been doing her very best recently to make me reconsider selling her to the circus—texted me from school. During school. Which was weird. And it got weirder. And my baby wasn’t okay, and despite weeks of clashing wills and shrill shrieking about how I am the worst mother ever, when all was said and done last night, my nearly-as-tall-as-I-am teenager curled up in my lap and hugged me hard and whispered, “Thank you,” because when push came to shove, she knew that Mama had her back. Because I do, always.

Now I’m left waiting to see what happens next, and fairly vibrating with rage in the meantime. Until we reach a conclusion here, all I feel comfortable saying is that some situations call for a righteous anger, and I will do my damndest to teach my daughter that if someone tries to shame her for someone else’s actions, she has the right to get good and pissed.

(I shared this over at Off Our Chests because I wanted to make sure other teenagers see it. But this is one I hope you’ll click through to read, especially if you have kids.)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 28 }

Party at my place! Except not!

by Mir on November 12, 2011 in It's not a regret, it's an "experience"

I thought today was a very boring day—I never even got dressed, to tell you the honest truth—but it all just got a lot more exciting ’round here.

Apparently I’m throwing a HUGE party. I’m sorry I forgot to invite you, but I didn’t even know myself until a few minutes ago. I guess I could invite you NOW, but I fear the party’s been canceled. I’m a party pooper!

Okay; let me back up. After watching about a billion hours of Pitbulls and Parolees with Chickadee this afternoon (spoiler: pitbulls are nice! as are some parolees!), Monkey said he was hungry and I told him to go ask Otto what he wanted for dinner. After a brief discussion, Otto offered to go out and pick up pizza and wings, which was fortuitous as 1) there was nothing good to eat in the house and 2) the rest of the family was still in pajamas.

Food was fetched, and we were all sitting here eating happily when the phone rang. (more…)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 38 }

Twang-a twang TWANG twang

by Mir on November 10, 2011 in What do I do all day?

I had noble intentions of putting together a deeply meaningful—but also hilarious, natch—post for your enjoyment, yesterday, but my day was derailed by a multitude of more pressing matters.

True, probably the least of my worries was the subcontractor who is out on the deck painting (did I mention that we replaced our siding while redoing the deck? because we did, because why not spend every last penny all at once!) and BLARING country music all freakin’ day long.

Part of me feels like: Hey, this is my house, and not only that, this is my OFFICE, and I am trying to work, and therefore I am well within my rights to ask him to please turn his music down (or off).

But the other part of me feels like: Dude is probably being paid minimum wage by the contractor, let him listen to some music while he spends hours and hours moving a paint brush back and forth, and P.S. don’t be a dick. (more…)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 34 }

After this, less death

by Mir on November 8, 2011 in Haven't been hit by lightning yet!

Okay, tomorrow I swear we shall return to things less death-and-despair themed. Probably. Not that I’m ever going to be Little Susie Sunshine, but I’m starting to depress myself.

That did not, however, stop me from ruminating a bit on murder (oh goodie, more death!) today over at Off Our Chests. Sorry.

Tomorrow: Kittens! Bunnies! Rainbows! And possibly Licorice’s new doggie door, and the hilarity therein.

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 3 }

Small town life (and death)

by Mir on November 7, 2011 in It's not a regret, it's an "experience"

One of the things I didn’t share recently, because I was worried it would make things harder for them, was that a few weeks ago my folks lost their dog. (You remember Buddy, right? He showed up for my birthday, wearing a tiara!) Buddy was having a hard time moving around when they were here in August, and in dog years he was already somewhere between “geriatric” and “Methuselah,” but that didn’t make it any easier to see him go. I cried when I found out, and he’s not even MY dog. He was just one of those wonderful creatures you can’t help but love, and even though his time had come and I’m certain he’s enjoying unlimited rawhides and squirrels and all the butts he can sniff in doggie heaven, it’s hard.

I was worried about my folks, too—especially my stepmom. My dad is better at compartmentalizing (that comes with the Y chromosome, right?), plus he’s out of the house at work nearly every day, whereas my stepmom is more like me and home all the time, feeling the Buddy-less void left behind. So it was with a small squeal of joy and maybe a sigh of relief that I read the email announcing their new puppy last week. The kids were excited, too, and I thought “Well, then. Circle of life. It’s sad, but it’s okay, and now there’s another dog to love, and life goes on.” It’s overly simplistic to say this, but in many ways the new puppy “fixes” this in my kids’ minds. (more…)

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 33 }

Five fortunately/unfortunatelys on Friday

by Mir on November 4, 2011 in It's not a regret, it's an "experience"

1) Unfortunately, our Internet is mysteriously down. Fortunately, my favorite coffee shop has both Internet AND pumpkin lattes.

2) Unfortunately, writing a post about Chickadee’s relative good health angered the Germ Gods, and she is home sick today. Fortunately, she’s old enough that I can spend a little time saying “Poor, poor little bunny” and then tuck her into bed with the dog and leave the house to work.

3) Unfortunately, I kind of sort of fell in a creek while on a forest exploration with Monkey and Hippie School yesterday. Fortunately, that was pretty much the worst thing that happened all day.

4) Unfortunately, after two weeks of smooth and flawless work on our deck, yesterday while I was out the construction crew apparently tacked up some trim work with their eyes closed. Fortunately, it should be easily fixed. I think.

5) Unfortunately, the school auction I’m heading up is eating up all my time and energy and really stressing me out. Fortunately, it’s almost over.

Viva la Friday!

  • email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Kirtsy
  • StumbleUpon
Comments { 12 }
« Newer Entries
Older Entries »
Design by LEAP