It's funny, because when I wrote about our dinner out and subsequent dessert demolition in the last post, several of you commented that you wish you could've seen it. And then I realized that I really wished I had given better description to what the kids did; I titled it "dueling spoons" but that was really a misnomer, because in fact, I have rarely seen the kind of cooperation they showed when it came to scarfing down that dessert. It was rather like watching Jack Sprat and his wife share a plate, actually. There was no squabbling. There was no "SHE GOT MORE!" or "HE'S EATING MINE!" or...
So, the night before the kids left this last time, we decided to make it a really special evening for them before they went. We took them to a strip club and got them all liquored up and gave them each a cigar and a fistful of dollar bills. Oh, wait. Wrong night. That was something else. My bad! Okay, so, we basically said to them "Whatever you want to do tonight, let's do that. You two get to pick!" That is---as any parent knows---a recipe for total disaster under the best of circumstances, anyway. But we are very slow learners 'round here. If you don't understand why our offer to them was...
This has not been my favorite week ever. There's lots of reasons, of course (many of them already blogged), but the main reason is that this week is sandwiched between a one-week trip and a two-week trip away, for the kids, and I really want us to make the most of our (scant) time together. Do you know what my daughter wants? She really wants to be angry. She wants to make her DISPLEASURE WITH THE WORLD known, because she is 10 and she's stuck in a sucky situation and SEETHING OPENLY seems like the logical course of action when you are 10 and stuck in a sucky situation. I really can't fault...
I thought it was high time I gave my children's father something new he could tuck into the "Reasons Why The Mother Of My Children Is Actually The Spawn Of Satan" file. Why, just a few months ago when we were in court he expressed his belief that the problem with the kids being here during the summer was that they would end up "watching television all of the time," which made me laugh out loud because I'm sort of the TV Nazi. I keep a tight rein on that remote, you know, because I gots to watch Mah Shows while I'm eating Mah BonBons. Obviously. So, no, it's not an endless stream of...
Me: Whatcha doin'? Her: Getting some water. It's HOT out. Can we go to the pond? Me: No, not right now. We're going to eat soon. You guys can hang out in the fort until it's ready, but I don't want you going all the way to the pond right now. After lunch you can. Her: Okay. How will we know when lunch is ready? Me: I'll call you. Or come out and get you. Her: Well which one? I need to know! Will you call or come? Me: One or the other. What does it matter? Her: I just want to be READY. Me: Uhh, what are you doing out in the fort that you don't want me to see, that you're worried about me...
We're just past the halfway point of the kids' first week away this summer, and truthfully, the days are passing at a tolerable pace. It helps to have a major catastrophe to tend to, I guess, to take my mind off of other things. LUCKY ME! Oh, I kid. The whole computer failure and subsequent retreat into the fetal position has only occupied a tiny (gigantic) sliver of my time. Actually, I've been quite busy with my little container garden out on the deck. And that's because I love to garden! Oh, wait. Actually, I think it's because some sort of mystery bug is eating through my banana pepper...
Yesterday was the first day of summer vacation. Yesterday I was trying very hard to make some of that "magic" I hear so much about, while still managing to get my work done and do those fabulous, exciting things like going for groceries because we didn't have any food. Yesterday afternoon my children had already decided they couldn't stand each other, and there were tears and bickering and pouting and I gave up. "I HAVE WORK I NEED TO FINISH!" I bellowed. "YOU TWO NEED TO GO PLAY OUTSIDE. NICELY. GOOD-BYE!" And then just to rub salt in their wounds (because I'm SUCH A GOOD MOM) I blurted...
Love fights the good fight, and speaks its truth as best it can, and trusts that things will work out the way they're supposed to. Love prays a lot. Love tries to figure out What's Best in a situation where nothing feels optimal, where everything feels potentially catastrophic, where animosity and differences of opinions and realities seem neverending. Love is staggered by what seems like a ridiculous solution where everyone loses---where a judge plays King Solomon (love's worst fear) and rather than accepting either truth, chops up the innocents and waits for the other players to relent....
Today is the last day of school, and that means my children have survived an entire year of learnin' courtesy of the great state of Georgia, and the more things change, the more they stay the same. For example, I was still scrambling around this morning putting together teacher gifts, just like every year. And I was hacking up a watermelon for a class party, last night, while complaining about it. That didn't used to happen until June, back up north, but BELIEVE ME, it happened. And I promised my daughter pink hair (new, true) and completely failed to deliver (not new) just the way I am...
