You are so passive-aggressive

Hey, I met you halfway on the garbage thing. I relented and took it out last night even though it was cold outside and I was already in my slippers. And I do truly appreciate your help in making sure it was the trash itself and not a dying rodent hiding in my kitchen....

Can’t buy me love

Boots of Power: $80 on clearance. Pretty paper for my resumes: $5. Rawhide for the dog/pony: $1. Finally being able to email someone very dear to me that I’ve landed a great job and receiving the reply that reads “NO S#*%! YEA!”:...

Complicated

No, I did not buy the $96 purse. In fact, I giggled myself silly and the shoppers around me moved a little further away, with looks of mixed disdain and fear while they did so. (Dad, stop reading now. You’ve been warned. Turn back. The rest is boring, anyway.)...

Good taste

You have to be a special kind of talented to walk into Marshall’s and pick up a purse–on clearance–that’s still $96.

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