Well THAT never happens

By Mir
October 27, 2015

You are just never going to guess what happened to me today. NOPE. NOT THAT.

Why, today marks the fifth time in 4 years that my Discover card was hijacked. I have no idea why I’m so popular—or why the dirtbags who try to use it always go spend it so stupidly that Discover immediately catches on—but there you go. (Lest you think I exaggerate: I give you January of this year, August 2014, January 2014, and November of 2011, otherwise known as Saladgate.)

Feeling a little light in the wallet? Just steal my Discover number. Everybody’s doing it.

Anyhoo. That put a crimp in my day, and so I felt like I needed a little levity to take my mind off of it. I bet you didn’t know I’m super artistic, but I totally am. In fact, I made you some great illustrations of parenting teenagers. (If you want prints you can just pay for them with my credit card, apparently.)


  1. Brenda

    Saladgate was my favorite bizarre stolen purchase. Because salad is the worse, and imagining anyone even trying to order that much makes me laugh.

    • Mir

      Honestly Saladgate is on of my favorite stories because it’s just so weird. Also it was the first time it happened, and I probably would’ve found it a lot less charming if I’d realized it was going to become a twice-yearly headache.

  2. Brigitte

    Oh hey, my wallet IS a tad light these days, thanks! ;-)

    I dropped Discover ages ago, because they kept nagging us about not using it (I was too easily overwhelmed by having to WORK and sign up to get cash back) and they were sending us multiple, unneeded replacement cards in the mail, assuming I’d lost it.

    • Jessica (tc)

      This happened to me, too! I kept meaning to close the card, because I didn’t use it. (They also had my name wrong on the card/account for some reason, with the last letter of my first name appended to the beginning of my middle, so my first name was just Jessic. My name was Jessic Amiddle Last.) They eventually dropped me for non-use, and now I can’t get another Discover card. Oh, Discover, I hardly knew you! (…but now I’m glad, because apparently fraudsters really like Mir’s Discover card! They’d probably like Jessic’s too. Whoever she is.)

  3. Jenni H

    I’ve had my identity stolen twice, by the same person who has the same name as me and lives in the same state (although 3-4 hours away from me) who somehow got my ssn and likes to use it to sign up for credit cards. The most recent time she even paid the minimum on them for a few months until i notice and start locking everything down again.

  4. Jen

    I got 3 new debit cards in 2 months last year due to my card being hijacked. My favorite was when they tried to buy close to a grand in liquor in Pittsburgh, 15 minutes after I got gas in San Diego. Fortunately, my bank caught it. The lady from the fraud dept asked me if I was sure I hadn’t made the purchase online for a party or something – oh yeah, I totally forgot about that $1000 in booze I bought, silly me!

  5. Mel

    Have you tried getting one of those secure cards that you keep in your wallet to prevent your card being cloned? I’m not sure if it will help but it’s an idea.

  6. Mary K. in Rockport

    Don’t know where to comment on your “things you never thought you’d say” post so I’ll tell you here: No, you may not sleep in the same bed with your boyfriend in our house. You’ll just have to sneak around in the back seat of cars like regular teenagers.

  7. Meg

    I’m imagining someone at Discover getting an alert and sighing “Looks like Mir paid full price for this — must have gotten hacked again” and then hitting your number on speed-dial.

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