June 9, 2007 | Friends

The following all-points bulletin has been issued for the New England states:

Earlier today a beloved mother of seven disappeared from her home after a series of instant messaging exchanges. Police have been able to recover only small pieces of this communication, and can’t make heads nor tails of the messages within or determine with whom the vanished woman was speaking. The only clues they’ve extracted include these snippets:
enough family time
TWO WEEKS!
packing
heeeeeeeeelp
liquor?

Concerned citizens should be on the lookout for a petite woman in a minivan who appears somewhat robotic. She is believed to be headed north and is easily lured by the promise of margaritas.

Her family is praying for her safe return.

April 29, 2007 | Friends, What do I do all day?

Hey, guess what! My house didn’t sell this weekend, and today after church we pretty much did… nothing. That leaves slim pickings for posting, really. Let’s see. Possible topics for tonight include:

1) Whining about the fact that my house hasn’t sold yet;
2) Rambling on and on about the joys of a day at home where I spend the entire day sniping at the children to PICK UP PICK UP and snatching laundry from the dryer and putting it away IMMEDIATELY because the house must be kept clean (see item 1);
3) Pointing out that my acne has apparently not been notified either of the fact that I’m in my mid-30s or that I’m getting married next week;
4) The fact that my friend Julia is taking a walk.

Hmmm. Let’s see. Yep; asking for money narrowly beats out whining about the mundane.

Those of you who’ve been around here for a while will remember Julie as the reason I decided to walk 60 miles last summer. I didn’t manage to finish the walk, because I am a delicate flower and I got sick. That’s the bad news. The good news is that I raised a bunch of money before that happened. The even BETTER news is that Julie is not only still cancer-free, but now she’s doing a 5k to raise money for breast cancer research.

Go give her some money if you’re so inclined. Otherwise I am totally going to just bitch about the real estate market every day until my house sells. Let’s not let it come to that.

March 30, 2007 | Friends

[Note: Today I am fever-free, and it is with renewed zeal that I have decided to LIIIIIIVE!

That renewed zeal was somewhat dampened by the phone call requesting a showing of my (germy, dirty) house this very afternoon, but I am verrrrry sloooowwwwwly dragging my pale shell of a self around and cleaning.]

Quite a few folks I adore are blogging about Stop Cyberbullying Day, and although I don’t think I have anything new or insightful to add, I will say this: There are people behind the shiny screen. Yes! Truly! Actual living, breathing people and not just a 2-dimensional aggravating internet floating around, disembodied. There are people out there, and they have feelings just like you do, and families and hopes and dreams and fears, and don’t be an asshole to them just because you can’t see their faces. The end.

Now. Go find a blogger who’s having a hard day and say something nice. And remember, if you don’t have anything nice to say, maybe you should shut your yap. (I say that with love in my heart, you know.)

March 25, 2007 | Friends, It's not a regret, it's an "experience", Job? Huh?

So. BlogHer Business ‘07. I had this awesome post rattling around in my head about the overarching vibe of the conference. I was thinking about it all the long (silent!) drive home, and I was eager to sit down and make sense of it and communicate to you all just how different and awesome it was. Not that this past summer’s BlogHer in San Jose wasn’t also great, because it was, but some of the follow-on from that event was less-than-lovely, and I just don’t see that happening this time, for various reasons.

I was all set to lay it all out and share with you many epiphanies about what made the difference and why and how incredibly great it was, but then I discovered that Liz already wrote the post I had in mind. Damn her! If not for the fact that she is hilarious and fun to hang around with AND let me feel her belly when her baby had the hiccups, I’d probably be annoyed. But read her take, because she nailed it. (more…)

March 20, 2007 | Friends, Job? Huh?

I last went to New York City about twenty years ago. My father took me there for a weekend; I was still, in my teenage wisdom, planning to become the next Meryl Streep, and needed to go to an audition in Manhattan to secure a spot in a prestigious summer theater program. (I was accepted and went and had a great time and went on to win several Oscars. Well, maybe not that last part.) We ate a lot of good food and I spent a couple of hours sitting slack-jawed with wonder at a Broadway show, and best of all, I had my Daddy to protect me from the vermin of the city.

Now I will only have Chris to protect me, which should be sufficient if all I need to do to repel a mugger is show him that I’ve tucked my favorite little sparrow robot into my purse like a talisman. (more…)

November 16, 2006 | Friends

I think there are some people who come into our lives to test us (sometimes to the very limits of our endurance), and some people who come into our lives to love us in a way that humbles us as nothing else can. Both of these are important lessons.

Sometimes, you get both in the same person. (Most often in our offspring. Heh.)

In the spirit of the new Kind Blog, I’ve been thinking a lot about who people are to me in my life, and who I want to be to others. (more…)

September 27, 2006 | Friends, What do I do all day?

Your pretty Mir is busy. Deal with it. (more…)

September 19, 2006 | Friends

I’m considering having my telephone surgically implanted in my skull. It seems like it might save me a bit of time and neck pain. In the meantime, in the course of one morning I managed to call up a dozen different people for a dozen different matters, all of which more or less boiled down to “Hi, here is my open wallet, help yourself.”

[My ex actually made me giggle, this afternoon. I said, "So, I got Chickadee that appointment with the orthodontist," and he said "I'll start scoping out some local banks to rob." Which was funny! Because kids are so damn expensive! But at least we're joking about robbing banks rather than, say, telling her she'll have crooked teeth and she'll LIKE it. Because that would be wrong.]

Anyway, the end result was a busy day where I got nothing done, and so I am going to abdicate being interesting this evening and instead send you over to visit Sue Richards. Sue is a lovely human and a proponent of healthy boobs everywhere, and you KNOW how I feel about the boobs. (Healthy boobs, good! Lumpy boobs, bad!)

Despite my glaring American-ness and questionable cleavage (or lack thereof), Sue directed me in taking a sworn oath and then declaring me an official Breast Ambassador at BlogHer this year. She is Good People and the Breast of Canada mission is an admirable one (not to mention that the calendar is gorgeous). Please go check her out and spread the word.

(Also, if I happened to be, say, meeting with a new doctor tomorrow for a second opinion on my son’s care, I’m sure I wouldn’t mind if you had some good thoughts or juju or whatever to spare to nudge over in this direction. If I was doing that.) (BOOBS!)

August 17, 2006 | Friends, Haven't been hit by lightning yet!

Well, I’ve been 35 for nearly a whole day, and it doesn’t feel much different. Then again, I felt about 50 before today, so… make of that what you will.

Things I did not have to clean up today: Vomit, pee.
Thing I did have to clean up today: Poop. (Dog, you have overstayed your welcome. I don’t care how cute you are, you have defiled my home repeatedly. Begone.)

Traditional dessert I did not have today: Cake. (Maybe tomorrow.)
Traditional dessert I did have today: Ice cream. Woohoo!

(more…)

July 31, 2006 | Friends, Haven't been hit by lightning yet!, Woohoo!

I am home! I am exhausted! And I am (apparently) still on Pacific time, so here I am.

I am RIGHT AT THIS VERY MOMENT licking my cable modem, because it’s just so goshdarned nice to, you know, HAVE INTERNET. (My favorite internet-connectivity—or lack thereof—moment from this weekend: Someone leaning over to me and saying, “You know, even at a conference that isn’t ABOUT THE INTERNET I can CHECK MY EMAIL.”)

We brought the system to its knees, I guess, and it turns out that I really CAN live for a few days without checking my email or blogging, though it was touch-and-go there for a little bit.

Anyway, I must SLEEP, but there are a few things to say, first, before I burst into flame what with all the unrequited blogging energy. (more…)