Archive | August, 2008

I laughed, I cried, I was poisoned

by Mir on August 31, 2008 in It's not a regret, it's an "experience", Job? Huh?

I am home from the Decatur Book Festival, and I’ve gotta say that now that I’ve gone, I will go back every single year as long as I live in Georgia, because that particular gathering is pretty much a book nerd’s nirvana. I will go back, and I will do all of the same things again, EXCEPT that I will not whine at Joshilyn that “We HAVE to have sushi because I NEVER get to have sushi at home!”

Joshilyn did not want sushi. I whined and needled and she acquiesced, and so it came to pass that four of us found ourselves enjoying a lovely dinner at a local sushi joint.

Afterwards we went to a martini bar and hung out with some folks and this was all on Friday night, right after we’d gotten there, and all I could think was, how lucky am I? I’m hanging out with some of the coolest people I’ve ever met, this is SO MUCH FUN. (more…)

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Hello, I must be going

by Mir on August 29, 2008 in Job? Huh?, Offspring: ecstasy and agony

Hey, I have a handy tip I’d like to share with y’all. Because I’m helpful, that way. And I know that you will thank me, because this one is a real gem.

Here it is: Do not let an orthodontist put the first set of braces on your child the day before a four-day weekend. YOU’RE WELCOME!

I know, it seems like a silly thing, but OH MY GOD, just trust me on this one. Because you’ll be all “Ho hum, braces today, make sure we’re having soft food for dinner, no problem,” and then you’ll leave early to get into the carpool line so as to pick the child up immediately after school so as to make it to the orthodontist’s office (which is, of course, located across town, as far away as humanly possible from where you live but still within the same city), and then he’ll get the braces on and everyone will smile and praise him for being such a good boy, and then you’ll drive BACK across town and get inside the house and have just about set down your purse and taken off your shoes and checked your email when that same child will say, “Mama? Don’t be mad. I think I broke them.” (more…)

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Love’s memory

by Mir on August 28, 2008 in Offspring: ecstasy and agony

I’m not being the person I want to be, this week. I’m not entirely sure why, either. Sure, I’m tired, I’m fighting a cold, I’m feeling somewhat overwhelmed with work… but none of those things is the reason. Maybe it’s the combination, maybe it’s none of that at all. I am just—as I grumped at someone, earlier—Having A Week.

The unfortunately side effect of this situation is that I’m not exactly being patient with my children. I am TRYING, really, but if I’m being perfectly honest I have to admit that I am NOT succeeding.

They are driving me nuts. They are driving me nuts by BEING KIDS. The nerve of them. (more…)

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A family’s special love

by Mir on August 27, 2008 in Haven't been hit by lightning yet!, Offspring: ecstasy and agony

Oh, many of you scoffed when I mentioned planning out our weekly menus, but so far it’s made for a kind of calmness in the afternoon that we haven’t had in a LONG time. I refer to myself as the Dinner Nazi, sometimes—I love the family dinner thing, and I will DEMAND we all eat together so that we can have some Quality Family Time. And it’s totally SHOCKING, I know, but that tends to work out a lot better when I’m not running around like a headless chicken figuring out what we’re actually going to EAT during that special time when we’re bonding.

Besides, a whole lot of tormenting goes on at our table, and it just seems more fair if we have something yummy to eat while that’s going on. Call it a balance, if you will. I mean, the kids will be in therapy for years, but they’ll never be able to complain about what I fed them. (more…)

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Unrequited

by Mir on August 26, 2008 in I'm dating the television

When I was in middle school, there was a boy I sat near. I always knew where he was and what he was doing and—perhaps most importantly—what grades he’d gotten on any recent tests. I’ve always been attracted to brainy types, you see, and that JERK not only got nearly perfect grades, he used to GLOAT about them.

“I beat you. AGAIN,” he used to say to me, even if his score was only a single point higher than mine.

“Shut up,” I’d mutter, stuffing my test into my backpack and giving him a look intended to melt his face off.

He often brought up things or asked questions in class that even the teacher couldn’t answer, and then sat there in smug satisfaction at having stumped the supposed expert. He talked about things no one understood. He seemed mysterious. (more…)

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Glamour and grace, that’s me

by Mir on August 25, 2008 in It's not a regret, it's an "experience", Ottomatic For the People

Last night was a typical Sunday night ’round here, which is to say that the children were bouncing off the walls and Otto was trying to finish up some work to prepare for the week and I was realizing exactly how much I hadn’t gotten done all weekend long. That always brings all kinds of joy and rapture, and also (in this case) a bunch of banging around in the kitchen.

Otto and I are trying something new, owing to our rising grocery costs and my complete inability to think more than a day or two ahead—we’re doing weekly menu planning. I know, right? it’s like we invented this novel concept! (Unrelated: I am not sure if you’ve heard of THIS, either, but I hear there are now telephones that don’t need to be plugged into the wall. CAN YOU IMAGINE?) Anyway, I think it’s going to be great. Really. Eventually. (more…)

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Mixing work and friendship

by Mir on August 23, 2008 in Friends, Job? Huh?, Retail Therapy

I had grand plans for this afternoon—plans that did not, in fact, involve the computer—yet somehow it’s nearly dinnertime and here I am. I had several hours all to myself today, too. Poof! Gone! Not sure what happened there, but I strongly suspect it involved PathWords. And in case y’all are unaware, you know Aimee? Aimee who comments here all the time? Aimee is a PATHWORDS NINJA. I could play PathWords for a month and never get anything near what she scored. I strongly suspect she cheated.

(Confidential to Aimee: Haha! Just kidding! I’m sure you’re just brilliant!)

(Confidential to everyone else: Total cheaterpants, that one.) (more…)

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Hey! Whoops!

by Mir on August 22, 2008 in It's not a regret, it's an "experience"

Guess what happens when your husband calls and says you have a typo in the link in your post, and you try to fix it from your iPhone? You delete the entire post! Whoops!

So now this is all you get. I was trying to tell you that I’ll have a new post up at Scholastic later today, and it contains one of my favorite words. See if you can spot it.

You also get this: Via Verbatim, the greatest YouTube video I’ve seen lately:

Comments { 41 }

Love doesn’t fit in a box

by Mir on August 21, 2008 in Offspring: ecstasy and agony, Ottomatic For the People

Just a quickie, today, as I’m running around.

Karen Walrond’s Love Thursday post today is about friendships, and it reminded me that although I have a terrible picture to accompany this story, I wanted to share it. [Edit: I came home and the blurry photo was still bothering me, so I took a better one to replace it. Revisionist history! Right here on Woulda Coulda Shoulda!]

Back when Otto and I got married, he took the kids aside the day before the wedding and gave them each a gift. Monkey got a tie clip that matched the one Otto would be wearing, and Chickadee got a necklace. A prayer box necklace.

A prayer box, if you’ve never seen one, is a little box charm designed to hold a prayer—you unhinge it, whisper your prayer inside, and then close it up and wear the necklace, keeping the prayer close to your heart. (more…)

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I guess the honeymoon’s over

by Mir on August 20, 2008 in Ottomatic For the People

The nice thing about being a newlywed, the second time ’round, is that I’m old enough and wise enough (wise being a relative term, given that the first time ’round I was spending my time alternating between thinking “What have I DONE?” and “Maybe everyone is this miserable and no one tells you!”) to actually ENJOY it. I mean, what a concept, right? Enjoying your mate? Basking in the glow of two (or in our case, four) lives meshing together in a way that doesn’t make you fantasize about killing anyone in their sleep? I hardly knew it was possible.

[And I'm not even just saying that because this weekend the kids renamed Marco Polo to Otto Polo and squealed and splashed in the pool while Otto chased them.]

Unfortunately, if I’m being totally honest, I have to confess that… well, we do have a problem. A small problem. It’s nothing, in the grand scheme of things. Really.

But… Otto and I are having a problem in bed. (more…)

Comments { 78 }
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