Things I did this weekend

Alternately, Stuff I did while avoiding doing actual work.
Or even, I am super productive when I’m procrastinating.

* Missed seeing a friend on her birthday because I am so disorganized.
* Apologized to said friend and made plans for later this week.
* Realized I hadn’t seen another friend in far too long; made more plans.
* Talked with a third friend about future plans when she returns from a trip.
* Spent a full five minutes marveling at how far I’ve come since my cave-dwelling hermit days because THREE FRIENDS! PLANS! SOCIAL! WOOOOOO!
* Stripped all beds, washed sheets, made up all beds.
* Laid down on freshly made bed wondering if there is anything better in the whole world than fresh, clean sheets on an unrumpled bed.
* Was immediately joined by a dog with muddy paws. (You know in cartoons how there’s an audible *POP* when a character’s happy bubble is burst? It was like that.)
* Did more laundry.
* Stalked my husband’s social media to see how his trip was going.
* Talked to my husband on the phone and assured him that I wasn’t worried at all.
* Texted with my daughter during the car parts of their journey (Her: I’m boooored! Me: Try talking to Otto…?) and enjoyed the radio silence that signified having-too-much-fun-to-talk during the non-car parts.
* Actually participated in a telephone survey about my grocery shopping habits, because I felt bad for the guy doing the call. (“Now let’s discuss the produce section at your local market….” Yes, let’s!)
* Watched the season finale of Sister Wives, a show I never watch, but then I missed the critical last few minutes because our DVR took over to record something else. I was annoyed until I remembered that I don’t care.
* Exercised for twice as long as usual on both Saturday and Sunday. I don’t even know who I am anymore.
* Grocery shopped and remembered everything I meant to buy, except I couldn’t find any oat bran.
* On my way to checkout, found oat bran on a clearance table. (This is what passes for excitement on a Sunday morning, okay?)
* Made a giant batch of beans because it makes me feel morally superior to cook dried beans and freeze to pull as needed rather than using cans. (Also because I was out of beans in the freezer.)
* Harvested and roasted eggplant for tonight’s eggplant parmigiana.
* Picked tomatoes. So many tomatoes. All of the tomatoes. Spoiler alert: made tomato sauce.
* Picked and froze jalapeños.
* Made shrimp scampi for my shrimp-loving boychild. Earned many Mom Points.
* Baked a batch of banana-cranberry-oat bran muffins that came out as yummy muffins and not hockey pucks.
* Made a big jar of enchilada sauce for later this week.
* Burned the crap out of my index finger with the brilliant decision to scrape off the enchilada spoon WITH MY FINGER even though the sauce was boiling and the spoon was metal. Am smart.
* Dishes. And then more dishes. And more dishes.
* Vacuumed.
* Cleaned my desk.
* Broke down a bunch of boxes for recycling. (Note that I NEVER do this. I throw them into the bin still as boxes and then Otto asks me why I do that and I tell him it’s part of my charm. I offer this by way of illustration of exactly how committed I was to this procrastination thing.)
* Cleaned bathrooms.
* Watched my son play some weird video game he’s always playing where his Super Special Sword Thing kind of looks like a long-necked banjo. He made many words about what he was doing. I listened carefully even though none of it made any sense to me.
* Went to bed earlyish last night even though I knew Otto and Chickadee would be home late because I knew I’d have to get up early today to finish the work I didn’t do over the weekend.
* Was jolted awake by barking dogs in the middle of the night when my darlings returned.
* Recovered from the near-heart-attack induced by barking by laughing myself silly over the fact that Duncan was convinced Otto was an intruder because he couldn’t see him and was sleep-confused. Poor Otto had to enter our room verrrrrryyyyyy slooooowwwwlyyyyy and offer many doggie platitudes before Duncan was willing to stand down from his alert.
* Was mostly unable to sleep because of worrying about the amount of work I still need to do.

In conclusion: Clean house; full fridge; still dumb.


  1. dad

    Loved it.

  2. Alison C

    You’ll need to take a day off now to recover from your weekend!

  3. Diane

    Sigh. I need to find something to avoid so I can get other things done. Minus the dog with muddy paws.

  4. RuthWells

    I changed four light bulbs and called it a win.

  5. Brigitte

    At least your procrastination is productive. Mine usually involves reading or playing video games.

  6. StephLove

    Stuff I did while procrastinating paid work this morning:

    1) On the way home from day camp drop off stopped at Starbucks and read for a half hour.

    2) Because I wanted to finish the podcast I was listening to on the bus home, went straight to the garden and weeded for 20 minutes.

    3) When iPod battery died in the middle of podcast, abandoned still weedy garden, facebooked and read this post.

    4) 10:40 and no work done yet. Thinking of exercising instead.

    Work? What work? I have stuff to do.

  7. Tracy B

    Perfect weekend! I always end up in the kitchen when I procrastinate as well. Only I bake and eat and bake some more. Yesterday, I made Thanksgiving only with chicken and not turkey. It was delicious and I ended up miserable. ;)

  8. not supergirl

    You did so much, I wouldn’t be shocked if you accidentally did the thing you’re procrastinating about. I have my most productive days that way, too. Clearly, it’s a strategy, not a fault. Right? Right!

  9. Sharon

    If procrastination received a grade, you’d get an A+. Here’s my thinking: The stuff I need to get done will always get done. On my way to getting that stuff done, if I get other stuff done, then I’m winning all around:)

  10. Javamom

    It takes talent to procrastinate about work…you seem to have that down! :)

  11. Jeanie

    That’s more than I do in a month!

  12. Mary


  13. Aimee

    For someone who was procrastinating over work you sure did do a lot of work, lady! I trust that Otto and Chickie had fun?

  14. Chuck

    Your days off sound much more productive than my upcoming ones will be. Maybe I’ll try planting a tomato plant in the empty pot on my patio or something.

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