By Mir
November 8, 2008

I’m feeling funky.

Not like, “Check me out, I’m fabulous!” funky, either. More like “GOD, STOP LOOKING AT ME!” kind of funky.

And nothing’s wrong. There is no crisis. There’s only a small and insignificant string of minor annoyances and my inability to cope with them without feeling like I’m having the everlovin’ crap irritated out of me. (And, apparently, my inability to write a sentence that isn’t awkward. Sorry about that.)

This too shall pass, but in the meantime, I’m a real joy to be around.

Seriously, do you want to know how bad it is right now?

It’s so bad that I bought myself some shoes today—boots, to be exact, and you KNOW how I loves me some fancy boots—and after my usual deal-hunting and coupon utilization and such, I got them for about half off; and they are sweeeeeeet; and it DIDN’T CHEER ME UP.

That’s bad, people. I’m a little afraid.

Anyway, I’m going to go try a large dose of family togetherness to get over myself. That will probably help. Or result in a huge debacle. But I’m hoping for the former.

I need something to shake myself out of this, but I’m not sure what. A blow to the head? A pedicure? A solitary soak in the tub until I turn into a prune? Stealing from the children’s Halloween candy? (That was last week. Not helpful.) Endless episodes of CSI:Miami with Otto? (Wait, we tried that last night. Didn’t help.) A V8?

Do you have a sure-fire method for breaking out of a funk?

Hey, wait a minute. Maybe this is my mid-life crisis! Damn, if so, it’s way less fun than I thought it would be. Also, I have no desire for either a tattoo or a boob job, so clearly I’m doing it wrong.



  1. Barbara

    Are your boots made for walking? Walking, yes, sure-fire way to break out of a funk, but the mall is not the place, ’cause if there is a mid-life component, the walk could be very expensive. Combined with family togetherness, walking has added value. Combined with nature, walking is an antibiotic for funk.

    Mid-life crisis intervention requires an automobile. Less painful than body modification – which is also an effect of, you guessed it, walking. You’re welcome!

  2. ~annie

    I’ve also been feeling a bit mopey lately. The long, hot bubble bath usually works for me. Being outdoors, getting some exercise, too. Today I did something that usally wears me out and makes me crabby, but it had the opposite effect this time. Critter’s Sunday School class is putting together a “care package” to send to troops in Iraq. Maybe thinking about who would be at the receiving end and unpacking the things we bought and what I would want if it were me put my blahs into perspective. The big, warm, soft pretzel at the end of the shopping trip probably helped, too. Hope you find something that will do it for you!

  3. Tatiana

    My funk cure is to play with my chihuahuas until they cheer me up. Or, I’ll ask my husband to “please fuck the cranky out of me”, which also works most of the time. Making something that’s warm and comforting like an apple crumble also helps :] Good luck!

  4. Cindy

    For the type of occasional funk where I feel like I’m coming unglued and everything/everyone is getting on my LAST NERVE, I spell relief x-a-n-a-x.

    Maybe not for everyone but works great for me.

  5. The Other Leanne

    You and me and everybody else I talk to. Buying toys doesn’t help, I can tell you that, because rather than opening with wild, joyful abandon the “Guitar Hero” bundle I bought yesterday I let it sit there for a couple of hours and finally said, “oh, I’d better see what this is all about.” (See? I can write awkward sentences too!) And the new sweaters I bought are still in the bag as well.
    It’s the time of year, the change in weather, screwing with clocks, post-election letdown, crappy economic news, and whatever else you can toss in the stew (my doctor died, how’s that for a bitter seasoning?).
    The only remedy, as always, is to do something nice for someone else.
    (PS You are too young for a mid-life crisis, sweetie)

  6. Fold My Laundry Please

    Perhaps a shiny new sports car to emphasize the size of your…wait…that’s what men do when they have a mid-life crisis. Do women even have them? I thought we just had a once a month crisis.

  7. Vicki

    Brownies!!! Or hot chocolate!!! or jewelry! or sex! kinky lingere! Banana splits! See, there are a million and one ways to get out of a funk. Just don’t go buy a sports car or get anything tattooed or pireced or dyed. What about a haircut or new makeup? Remember what makes you excessively happy and do it. Even if its just buying a new magazine to read or something like that.

  8. Sillycakes

    Do you think it may just be letdown after all the anticipation regarding the election? I mean, what’s the next big thing on our collective agenda? For me, it’s the holidays, and not only are those going to be SKIMPY this year due to budgetary concerns, they’re a whole potful of stress as well.

    Great, now I’m depressing myself.

  9. Ariel

    Last time I was in a funk we went shopping and I bought a rat.
    (last night)It was a mini-funk, I guess.

    You might try volunteering at a homeless shelter or something like that. Seeing people in situations worse than mine help me to get a clearer picture of my own life sometimes :)

  10. Half Assed Kitchen

    Oh, I hate those moods. I’m in one myself. Has a lot to with only getting 5 hours of sleep last night and the husband being away and kid fatigue. The only thing that really helps is doing something that makes my soul sing. Like writing fiction.

    Have anything like that? I bet you do.

  11. Leandra

    A night out with the girls and copious amounts of wine. And chocolate. But mostly wine.

  12. Katie

    I’ve been in one the whole month of October. Don’t you have one of those fancy daylight lights? Maybe some added “sunshine” might help? I think half my issue is having deadlines looming over my head. I’m going to try to knock them out in the next few days and see if that helps.

  13. pam

    It’s going to sound cliche but when I get in the funky dumps I up my volunteering. I’ll stay an extra hour with the after school kids, or I’ll drop a $20 in the ‘will work for food’ guy’s hat (and yeah maybe he’ll spend it on booze but maybe his kid gets a burger).

  14. kd@abitsquirrelly

    It’s the weather and time change. Brings out the funk in everyone. I like getting a new ‘do and a mani-pedi. Time to regroup. Hang in there.

  15. Kady

    A brisk walk is my control-alt-delete for those moods.

  16. jennielynn

    Dancing. I put on my go to playlist and boogie until I feel better. But I am a humongous dork.

  17. Cathi

    Try my cure – it works for me and it only waste a little money. Get a dozen eggs and go throw them at a tree or something that can easily be hosed down afterwards. Buy the time you get toward the 12th egg you’re feeling too silly to be mad any more. And it’s cheaper and easier to clean up than throwing dishes!

  18. Damsel

    Curl up in bed in the middle of the day with a good book and a glass of wine, and read until you fall asleep. Then sleep until you wake up. It would help if Otto could keep the kid occupied. :-)

    Works for me every time.

  19. Cathi

    Oops – buy = by! Sometimes my fingers type faster than my brain thinks. Sorry.

  20. Rosie

    Sometimes I just need a good wallow. Woe is me. I don’t want to feel better. Then I get over it despite myself. Life happens. This too shall pass. Ok, I’m all out of tired cliches. I do like the idea of curling up in bed with a book.

  21. Megan

    Let’s see – since it’s now cool enough out our funk-breaking has been hiking up into the local mountains. Ours are high enough and big enough that we can get right up where there is no one else in sight or sound. Certainly worked this morning! Followed that up with gyros from the Mediterranean deli down the street and now, now we’re going to watch Dr Who and Primeval on BBC America until the cheesy effects and dry British humor just overwhelm us all with fabulousness.

    But hey, boots are good too!

  22. elswhere

    This happens to me almost every November. I find that chocolate helps, but you’ve probably already thought of that. We’ve been watching the first 2 seasons of 30 Rock on DVD, and that’s pretty cheering, too.

    Oh– crawling into bed and reading exactly the right book for a couple hours, sometimes. But it has to be the RIGHT one, or the book will just irritate me, too.

  23. tj

    Running is my de-funkifyer. I always think it won’t work, but by the 5th mile I just want to run forever!

  24. Sharon

    Hope you’re feeling better by now. If not, or even if you are, how about a movie? I love a good movie, one I really wanted to see but missed at the theater and is now out on DVD. In face, I’m off to watch one now.

  25. Nic_Bune

    I tend to subscribe to the “when you are in a mud puddle, the best thing to do is roll around in it – usually you come up laughing” theory. The painful part for me isn’t being funky, but rather saying that I SHOULDN’T be funky. Because then I’m just arguing with myself about how I feel vs. how I SHOULD feel. Which is a complete load of crap, and much more painful than just having the funk to begin with.

    If funk is what you have, sometimes you just have to keep digging that pit until you hit China. Go whole hog with it. Send out embossed invitations to your pity party. No, really.

    This method totally works for me. Your mileage may vary. But in any event, I hope you end up where you want to be soon.

  26. Heidi

    Blow some bubbles.

  27. juliness

    How ’bout a convertible? That worked for me. You know, until I had to give it up a year later when we had Ella. It wasn’t a bad trade though, so am totally NOT complaining. It was a “very good year…”

    Also, am LOVING ‘The Girl Who Stopped Swimming’ so Big Thanks to you on that.

  28. lindsay

    When I am in a funk it’s because I’ve been on the computer too long rather than engaging in real life. Not that this is the cause of your problem…

    but I too am in a mini funk and will now to choose to reengage in real life.

  29. Sheila

    Two words: Talledega Nights. Cheers me up every time.

    Shake and Bake, baby!

  30. Liz@thisfullhouse

    GAH, what Sheila said, stupid funny helps!

  31. StephLove

    If you find something that works, let me know. I’m a bit melancholy over here, too. The election helped a bit, but not as much as it should have. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that all four of us have been sick (in varying combinations) for the last 6 weeks at least and there doesn’t seem to be an end in sight.

    Plus I have no idea what I’m doing with my life, but that’s been going on a while now.

  32. Kate

    I’m sorry, if new boots didn’t do it, I can’t help you. But I DID buy some new boots for myself just in case I might feel a funk coming on, so thanks!

  33. Burgh Baby

    My trick is a girls’ day out with the Toddler, but I have a feeling that is far more effective than a day out with a hormonal and possibly nightmarish girl-child.

    Hope the cloud clears soon!

  34. nae

    a BIG cry…not a weep or a sob, a full blown ugly, snotty, body shaking cry! always does the trick for me x

  35. annette

    In light of our brief computer conversation I was going to suggest the cause may be post election REMORSE….:)See, I do have a sense of humor!

    For me, it is find a chapel somewhere and pray, ( as a Catholic, I go to adoration). Tell it all to God, ask Him to help you get out of the funk. Quiet time for me helps because it is such a rarity.

    My second vote is for chocolate.( quick and easy, doesn’t involve rearranging my life to get away)

    My third vote is for margaritas and girlfriends, start with a rant then end with all you are thankful for.

    Rent some chick flicks or watch some of those hideously stupid funny movies like Airplane.

    Fry some bacon…mmmm.

    I rented a 67 red Ford Mustang convertible for his 40th from a classic car rental place. We drove around the wineries in the Missouri hills then down into the city of St. Louis. That ranks as one of the best days of my life. Just a total break from reality. The only bummer was realizing how dang old I am looking at a car my age with the non-electric everything. Seriously, would my kids even know how to operate rolling down a window? What about the tape player?

    G) All of the above. With a little creativity do it all!

    Anyway, I was glad you posted. I was worried about you yesterday!

  36. Astrogirl

    I loved the commenter above who tells her honey to, “Fuck the cranky outta me!”

    I find one of two things usually works. Snuggling with the little boy, or taking a walk in the woods. Nothing else works for me, ever. But I’m a hermit, I dont like being around people much anyway and need to retreat to get my bearings again. Maybe that’s what it is for you? You just need to get away a bit and re-center?

  37. Em

    I say a soak, a pedi and your OWN candy!

    Sometimes I think the little things are so much worse than one big thing (please note, Mr or Ms Fate that I am not issuing a challenge). One big thing you can find an escape from. The little things seem to follow and multiply.

    I hope they melt away on their own with little or no intervention or worry from you.

    In any case, I have also heard that cruises are helpful. Little annoyances can’t swim.

  38. Lori

    Hmmmm, I think you need a girl’s night. Nothing outrageous. Just some good fun with your fav friends. For extra fun, get liquored up and enjoy some karaoke!

  39. Tami

    I find it so interesting how many people are also feeling so funky. I like that word. I too am feeling down, a little sad. I haven’t figured out how to climb out of it. Shopping doesn’t even sound tempting. I did go to dinner with my hubby tonight and had a good conversation, his advise was that sometimes you need to let it ride. Things will balance out.

  40. Hecticmom

    The Xanax comment made me laugh – that’d probably work too.

    For me, I usually need a really really good night’s sleep


    exercise until I sweat (which I HATE – but it always makes me feel better.)


    getting all that nibbling shit done that I’ve been procrastinating. Like calling the vet, and refilling my perscription, and buying the birthday card that I meant to send, and paying that bill for the over-due magazine.

  41. ChristieNY

    I wish I had a defunkifier right now, I’m in a funk too. I think I need some sunshine. Maybe SAD is setting in a bit early this year?

  42. Jamie

    I got a tattoo for my mid-life crisis. I love it! It didn’t hurt much. And it was cheaper than a boob job!

  43. B

    My way of getting out of a funk? Cinnamon rolls. Homemade cinnamon rolls. And lots of them! I’ve “had” to make them two nights in a row now. I’m feeling fantastic tonight.LOL

  44. Jan

    New nail polish. Paint your nails or your toes. Works for me.

  45. Crazy_mom

    I’m in a funky mood a lot—a really good cry helps sometimes, just get the funk out! Watch Terms of Endearment, Beaches, Steel Magnolias or some other sappy, 20-year-old, bad hair, sympathy soaker! Today my daughter and I watched My Dog Skip and cried together on the couch—even she noticed how much better we felt afterward.

  46. alala

    Hm. What about a small, fast car? Here in Germany, the popular word for such a car (I swear I’m not making this up) is “midlife crisis.”

  47. Tracey

    Exercise definitely helps. (So why is it when I know that I don’t make it happen every day? I know the funk thing, I do it well.) When I get those exercise endorphins happening I DO feel better. I know that’s been suggested above. My stuff is swimming (an adult swim squad class) and cycling. Great quote from some famous person or other: “It’s impossible to be melancholy on a bike.” It’s very true.
    A bike is also cheaper than a V8! And a tandem bike is a whole heap more fun, and still cheaper than a V8. (And you get to do family togetherness, either with kids or with partner..) If the rest of the daily *stuff* didn’t get in the way, I’m sure I’d keep the funks at bay.
    Good luck.

  48. Brigitte

    I had to read just to make sure you weren’t funky as in “Having a moldy or musty smell”. Though the long bath may help in more than one way, there.

    I don’t have anything special that gets me out of such moods, and I’m not sure I’m ever COMPLETELY out. I just slog along through my daily grind until things start feeling a little lighter on their own. :-(

  49. Ashlea

    log onto Pandora radio and plug in one of your favorite music stations. Turn it up REALLY loud and go about making little changes in your house as you listen and sing along.
    Put some pretty flowers on the table. Move some books around, light some candles and then either a) rent an oldy but goody movie b) read an oldy but goody book,
    It works every time!

  50. sheila

    Get a bowl of your favorite chocolate and watch a feel good movie like RUDY. Now, if you are in a funk that is an angry type funk, watch Die Hard or something where a bunch of people get shot up. Come over to my place and get a free obama sticker. Free stuff should cheer you up! lol

  51. Debbie

    I’ve definitely been in a funk for a while now and still going. However, I went up to the mountains one weekend (my happy place) for a wedding and found the getaway to be just what I needed. Also, being a part of a family for a weekend that wasn’t my own gave me a mood boost and re-appreciation for my family.

    Try it. Find your happy place. Steal away your husband. Take the kids or send them to some family members for a day or two. You need this. You’ll be good as new.

  52. Debbie

    I forgot!!!! A good friend of mine introduced me to these double chocolate cake cookies… it won’t get you COMPLETELY out of the funk, but it sure will get you very close there. I definitely made and ate a lot of these cookies before and after the trip and it just helped make coping with the day-to-day and my mood a lot easier. Everyone loves them, so you can share too and it’ll make you feel good that you’ve found something they love.

    This has to be the simplest recipe. Just grab a duncan heines cake mix (it’s double dark chocolate or something like that) and the recipe is on the box.

    It’s best if you incorporate them with white and milk chocolate chips!
    Hope you feel better soon———

  53. Lindy

    I suggest a beer (or three) and a bubble bath at the same time. And maybe some music of choice or some other waterproof distraction. It’s my failsafe.

  54. Sarah H

    A trip. Even for a day.

  55. Stephanie

    Well, I have generally been able get myself out of a funk by going to bed and waking up the next morning or doing some gardening…but, that doesn’t seem to be working for me, this year, which has possibly been the funky-est of my life. I hope you’re not in a prolonged time of funky-ness, and this is just a minor hick-up…try adding a funky year to turning Fifty…HEY!!! There you go! You have YEARS and YEARS before you turn FIFTY!!! Think about THAT…it should help pull you out of the funk. :-)

  56. Kris

    Vodka. And chocolate.

  57. laurie

    We talk about this post in a podcast we recorded today. The other Laurie has a great solution…I’ll let you know when we post it (end of week-ish?) Can you wait that long?

  58. premenopaws

    As my last boyfriend used to tell me, “clearly you need to get laid.”

  59. Berni

    Wine, chick flicks, and oddly enough cleaning out the garage. Seriously, I cleaned out the garage today and have that smug satisfaction of actually getting something accomplished. And, oh yeah, CHOCOLATE!!

  60. Anna

    A good CD, with lots of energetic music- maybe a new CD if you want!
    Alternately, *silence*. Pure, unadulterated SILENCE.

  61. Jen Zeman

    Running is a great way to pull out of a funk – works for me every time. I agree with others who say it could be the change in the weather. Gray, damp days can suck the life out of me! Hope you’re feeling more chipper soon!!

  62. dad

    Sometimes funk happens. Even to us cheerful types. I suggest you handle it better that I did and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, which of course give you incredible flexibility. A few of suggestions: (1)Be a sensation as a guest on the Oprah Winfrey show. (2)Publish the great American novel (write it first). (3)Make your kids laugh. Its good for you and them. (4)Have a long talk with with your daddy.

    This too shall pass.

  63. Lylah

    I’m going through one right now, too. Usually, I can break my way out of it eventually. This one? No dice. I’m trying to make myself feel better by helping other people, though, because even if it doesn’t break my funk at least some sort of good will come out of it…

    Hang in there!

  64. Christina Anderson

    Ya know, all happy fru fru aside, when I have a case of the icks (aka funk), I just grab my bottle of Phyto-Proz Supreme (all natural depression-fixer herbal blend) from the health food store and pop one in my mouth with a bit of water and swallow.

    In about 30 minutes, I’m feeling capable of enjoying life again, and I can go do something nice to actually cheer myself up and it will work (like stealing the kids’ candy and taking a hot bath with a great book, or just reading blogs I’ve not seen in ages). *grin*

  65. margie

    i have a dentist appointment today. not so much fun. and i am having a sad week, it has been ten years since my late husband died, at the age of 52, i am taking my camera to the dentist with me. what the heck. i may as well document the misery. all things pass, sometimes you just have to lie down and let the funk roll. you will feel better soon.

  66. crockpot lady

    I think sillycakes it right and it’s election-is-over letdown. Whenever something I’ve been looking forward to happens, I get funky until I have something else to plan/look forward to.

    you’re not alone.

  67. ImpostorMom

    I fully recommend a good nose piercing for that life crisis. :D

  68. Ann

    I feel in a funk because it is dark when I go to work, and it is dark again when I get home – thanks to the time change. I have no ambition to do anything at home (housework, etc.) because of the darkness. I truly am a morning person – that is when I am most productive. Sadly, my employer expects me to actually work the 40 hours I am being paid for, so my productivity is all but gone by the time I get home. At least we can look forward to Christmas lights!

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