Too annoyed for titles

By Mir
April 20, 2007

I live at Panera now. As I’m unable to complete my work at home with my COMCASTIC internet (non)service, I’ve decided to just throw in my lot with the baristas and sandwich-makers. It’s gotta beat spending one or two hours every day on the phone with the nice, polite people in Canada who don’t know anything “aboot” the fact that my local technician center is manned by mentally-impaired toddler yaks.

This morning at 4:30 (I got up early to work, you know, hoping my COMCASTIC internet was back on, SILLY ME) the nice Canadian at Comcast who HAS internet service listened to my tale and admitted that the service I have received is—and I quote—“positively shameful.”

But do I have service? No, I do not.

But I do have a basement full of water.

And a 9-year-old recovering from gum surgery.

And a really big cup of coffee to go with my current murderous rage.

Otto will be here in a few hours (finally) and I will ignore him all weekend so I can do all the work I’ve not been able to do this week. It’ll be good practice for being married, right? HA. HAHAHA.

Kill. Me.


  1. tori

    Eat one of those turkey artichoke panini’s for me please. I love Panera, and while I am sad your internet isn’t working, you get to hang out in Panera, where it smells so yummy! Have I mentioned that I have not left the house since Monday (my birthday), being stuck home with a sick kid since then?

  2. Andrea

    Hang in there, Mir!! Perhaps you will stumble upon someone at Comcast who will surprise you by prorating your bill or a credit perhaps? Recently my phone/tv/internet company continued to charge me for something they claimed to have taken care of, and when I called yet again, the nice gentleman gave me a credit for my troubles. (We’ll see if it shows up on the next bill and/or if he fixed the problem that started this all.)

    Happy Friday!! Here’s hoping your kids had school today?! :)

  3. sumo

    What happened to the glugging sump pump?

  4. Mir

    Sumo: It is still glugging. And doing an excellent job on 70% of the basement.

    In the remaining 30%, water is seeping through the seams where the walls meet the floor.

  5. Em

    So sorry that all these bad things are going on. Maybe Panera will reserve a table for you and you can leave a pillow and blankie there for naps and such.

  6. Dave

    “The Saga of the Sump Thing!” On sale now, from DC Comics.

    Instead of asking Comcast for a credit, you should ask them to send a few customer service agents to come bail you out.

  7. rachel


    at least the kids are back in school. right?

    hope the day gets better.

  8. Kimberly

    ack! Poor Mir. Poor, pretty Mir. With pretty, pretty shoes.

  9. LadyBug Crossing

    Now I remember why I don’t have a basement…

    Hope you get your internet back soon!!

  10. Melanie Marie

    Oh, poor Mir.
    Did we tell you how very pretty you are?

    “retarded toddler yaks” ???

    I think I work with a few of those!

  11. Heather

    You have coffee, and access to really yummy food that you don’t have to make for yourself. If it makes you feel better I’m stuck at home with a drooling, teething seven-month-old baby who just learned that he can growl. Loudly.

    AND I just fed him prunes. Seriously, that picture HAS to make you smile a little bit. Right?

  12. Dawn

    GUM surgery? The poor thing. I hope she recovers quickly, because that does NOT sound fun. Then again, I am morally opposed to anything that interferes with my eating or puts me on a liquid diet for a few days.

  13. Aimee

    retarded toddler yaks? huh. just yesterday i was referring to my clients as retarded hamsters, but i like yours better.

    sorry comcast sucks. try asking for a supervisor, they’ll usually give you a credit or something to appease you.

  14. Cele

    I too will now use retarted toddler yaks as if it was of my own genius – er not genus.

    Oh, gum surgery, most kids get something a wee bit different than gum surgery for their birthday. I hope the dentist at least gave her half of the goody box.

  15. ChristieNY

    Oh Mir I’m so sorry. At least Otto is on the way… that’s got to offer you some comfort! Hang in there and eat some yummy food, food=comfort on days that are not so comcastic.

    Heather, my 6-month old has been blowing rasberries at me all day (sweet potato ones a few minutes ago). We should have a playdate, we can run our very own zoo! We can invite the comcast crew of retarded toddler yaks and entertain pretty Mir!

    Hang in there, Mir! :)

  16. Allanna

    Forget a “credit!” They should give you FREE INTERNET for life (that works 110% of the time), another sump pump AND hundreds of pairs of designer shoes (so if you hate them, you could always sell them on eBay and recoup to buy more shoes).

    “Retarded toddler yaks,” though … I’ll be laughing at that analogy for a couple of days. Even in the depths of trials, Mir, you’re insanely clever. I hope to achieve that someday.

  17. MomCat

    We would never kill you, Mir, not even as a mercy. Who could make us laugh so hard and cry so hard, sometimes from the same post?

  18. Sheryl

    Lord. I think any ONE of those things would be reason enough for a weekend at the spa. Everybody! Send Mir Panera gift cards!

  19. mcewen

    the 9 year old recovering from gum surgery gets my vote! Poor wee lambkin.
    Best wishes

  20. bec 37

    Mir, find out if your county has any sort of resource for you. When our Internet service became decidedly uncomcastic (in MD/DC metro area) we were able to turn to a county department taking cable complaints. Suddenly, stuff started happening. Not only did they fix everything quickly, important supervisory-type people who would never return calls before began calling us to make sure we were happy and could they peel us some grapes. So, it may be worth a call or two for you.

  21. Wendy

    I truly understand your pain. I went through this including our cable TV about a year after hurricane Katrina. It wasnt the hurricane. They were upgrading, blah, blah. Things seem to be fine, now. I just wish I had a Panera to go to.

    Hope the internet is back on for you, soon.

  22. daring one

    I will not. I think I’ll start with Comcast.

  23. meritt

    I don’t have Comcast… I am stuck with Mediacom which isn’t much better. Sure enough this week I tried to keep up with blogging but had a connection that I literally had to refresh the page at least 19 times to get a site up. I blogged about it… and WHY I wasn’t bothering to call them and what I would have to go through if I did.

    Instead i knew to wait it out. Sure enough, Friday (today) I’m back up to speed. (Having changed and/or done nothing different on our part).

  24. Melissa

    I have Verizon and find the problems are there too. Good luck with your work and I hope you have a chance for some Quality Otto time!

  25. Melanie

    Oh, poor you! I hope Comcast at least refunds you some money, and Panera starts a frequent buyer club so you can get free coffees or something. Cash back and freebies make a girl’s heart go pitter-patter, right?

  26. BOSSY

    Remember: You are in countdown mode. Makes most everything tolerable, yes?

  27. Heather C.

    I apologize on behalf of Canada. Even though I don’t say ‘aboot’… you must be talking to Canadians in Ontario… that’s where they say ‘aboot’.

    It’s like saying all Americans say ‘y’all’ which is kind of endearing if you ask me, but not if you ask a New Yorker.

  28. The Other Dawn

    I, too, apologize on behalf of Canada. We are really good at apologizing, you see. Not so much with the ISP service apparently.

    I, too, also, and as well, do not live in a part of Canada where they say “aboot” although the locals do say things very strangely to my ears at times. To be honest, I have never heard anyone say “aboot” except Americans imitating Canadians. But I have not yet travelled to all corners to our lovely country, nor have I dealt with the lovely folks at Comcast, wherever they may be, so cannot comment on that. I’ll trust Heather C. that it’s our good friends in Onterrible.

    In the meantime, you are too pretty for such troubles. Hope the basement dries up soon, Chickie recovers without incident and Otto’s presence sooths all woes.

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