Dating? Mostly I’m just packing.

In the comments on the previous post, someone asked if I am, indeed, dating. Of course, I’m not certain if that person was asking if I was dating or if I was airquotes, nudgenudge winkwink DAAAAATING, so I’m not quite sure how to answer. As for the former—it depends on how you define dating; and as for the latter; oh look! Something SHINY!

But I CAN tell you that today my membership to geeFlarmony expired. Isn’t that sad? It is sad. 6 months, no results. Unless you want to count TED. Ted and I were matched just this weekend! While I was away! And in the time it took for me to 1) access the mail and 2) go into my geeFlarmony account, Ted had already requested Fast Track communication—a.k.a. give me your email address right this second so that I can hack you into little bits as soon as possible—and then, THEN, closed the match because “my match never responded after repeated attempts at contact.” It had been less than a week.

So I’m heartbroken, naturally. I mean, with that sort of impatience, it’s possible that our man Ted here could’ve been an even better story than his fellow geeFlarmony misfit Whitey McBrother. I feel like an opportunity has been squandered, what with my blatant refusal to respond to him for the interminable period of… four days.

On the other hand, the whole recently-reunited-with-the-love-of-my-life thing has its perks. I’m fairly certain that with seventeen years of history behind us, I can trust that he’s not insane, or at least he’s a brand of insane that I can work with. None of this “wow, we dated for a couple of weeks and then it became clear that you’re a pathological liar” nonsense (which, truly, is interesting now and then, but I wouldn’t want to make a habit of it). None of this “wow, so, you’re actually a repressed homosexual, then” sort of thing (which, again; not that there’s anything wrong with that, but a woman can only tolerate so many of those before she starts to wonder if it’s time to change perfume).

And then on the third hand—because you really NEED a third hand for all of this, although if you actually HAVE a third hand I just… well… I don’t want to know—we’re not exactly living down the street from each other, so do we call this dating? I call this a whole lotta phone calls, personally. (Some of which start out with “What’re you wearing?” but I can’t say that because Otto will be embarrassed.) (Oops!)

Anyway, I hope that answers the question. Or at least confuses you sufficiently that you don’t ask it anymore. Okay! Thanks!

In other news, we are headed down to Boston tomorrow! night! The time for the 3-Day is almost upon us, and all I can say with conviction at this point is: I hope I don’t embarrass myself too badly. It remains to be seen. I don’t feel ready, in so many ways. On the other hand, I survived last weekend, which I suspect may have actually been MORE exhausting than this will be. So we’ll just have to see how it goes. Also, my duffel bag has shrunk, and my tendency to overpack cannot be indulged when there is a size and weight limit and certain essential items that must be included (like a sleeping bag and a camping mat and six gallons of bug spray).

So I may be a wee bit scattered at this point, what with the bolting upright in bed in the middle of the night shrieking “CLOTHESPINS!!” and stopping short on a trek to the kitchen midday to yelp “EARPLUGS! MUST BUY EARPLUGS!” and such. This may not be the best time to ask me for anything, really.

In closing, let’s pretend you are as fascinated by the gingiva of my offspring as I am. Shall we? Yes! We shall! Remember this? And then I was all sad thinking that Monkey would lose his tooth while I was gone? I needn’t have worried. At this point, I’m pretty much convinced that he’s NEVER going to lose that tooth or any other.


  1. Jules

    I’ll be thinking about you this weekend sweet lotus blossom…

    I love you!

    …what ARE you wearing? ;)

  2. Tug

    YOU will amaze this weekend, truly. BEST OF LUCK, HAVE FUN. Don’t forget the fun. As for the tooth? I swear a strong wind would have caught HS#1’S…..but he finally yanked it out. ‘Cause his momma promised him swimming if he did. ;-)

  3. Gillian

    What you and Otto person have is a grown up relationship.

    You are not wearing a frozen smile while you watch for red flags to pop up — my personal favorite, ‘I know you said you didn’t want to get married, but women always say that.’ Let’s see, (A)I am defined by being a woman (B) whatever I say is discounted because of (A) (C) I have just been called a manipulative liar and whatever I say will be dismissed out of hand. Eighteen flags down of the play.

    You two lost something precious. Each of you is willing to take the risk of an attempt to reclaim your relationship. I think you both have courage and integrity and you are both pretty. I think the to-do lists are about making it real and also Otto has a bit of nurturing in him. If any of us could show up at your door, (given that I would make an ass of myself at once to get it out of the way) we would want to be an Otto kind of friend doing things to make your days easier so you can squish your kids and make an excel file to maintain your bought ahead of time present stash.

    To celebrate the maturity you have displayed I am going to make you both virtual butterscotch chip pecan cookies and create a virtual 3 day weekend for your ‘wild escape from responsibility’. I will insist that Chickedee explain exactly how I should do everything with illustrations where applicable while I nodd and obey and Monkey and I will make a ‘Magic Wand Of Perfection.’

  4. mo

    My brother had four rows of teeth – two on top and two on the bottom. Each and every baby tooth had to be forcibly pulled by a professional. Hope Monkey doesn’t suffer from the same fate.

  5. Cele

    We of the peanut gallery (and the walnuts that snuck in) are proud of you Mir. We applaud you, look up to you, root for you, and are so glad it is you and not me, I mean we.

  6. Lady M

    Have a good trip to Boston! I am so enjoying reading your posts. Sometime I’ll write up our last cancer fundraiser experience at the Lance Armstrong foundation’s Ride for the Roses. We rode 100 miles (well, just SwingDaddy did), did volunteer work (me), and met some amazing people. Go, get ’em!

  7. Jim

    Enjoy the glow and go with the flow…


    Taking advice from me is a no-no.

  8. Niki

    My youngest had a long-term shark tooth. The first one really never got loose, however, the dentist had it out in about 5 seconds, and she didn’t mind at all. Of course, she loves the dentist. And the doctor. Anyone to give her attention and focus on HER!

  9. Stacia

    My husband and I were friends from highschool. After his wife left him (after almost 10 years together) he decided we had been friends for so long for a reason (we had stayed in touch). I told him he was insane, but he slowly won me over. The only problem: I lived in Madison, WI and he was in the Navy. We eloped before either of us moved. It was the best thing I ever did. Having that history makes things easier. So, dating, maybe not, in a relationship, yes.

    Good luck this weekend. I’ll pray that it cools down!

  10. Meramoo

    You sure picked a good time to come on down here, the weather is FINALLY supposed to break tonight. Good luck w/ the race!

  11. Amy-Go

    GO MIR GO! Just picture Otto waiting at the finish line wearing nothing but a smile. The miles will fly by! ;)

    Sorry, Otto…

  12. Randi

    Yes, but when will the mysterious Otto reveal himself and poset a comment?

  13. jes

    Mir, I’m totally imagining you in Boston for the 3-day walk.
    OOh! But then, I’m also concerned. Is it okay for me to be concerned about whether you get to shower or change clothes? Because 3 days of walking without showering or changing clothes means there are going to be a BUNCH of stinky people in Boston soon.

    Even if it is for a good cause.

  14. Genevieve

    My kiddo has shark teeth too (and I thought I made up that phrase, after we saw a giant shark jaw in the aquarium, but apparently it’s the common term). He just lost a baby tooth in front of a shark tooth. It was loose for months, I swear. So there is hope!

  15. chris

    Good luck with the walk, Mir.

    I’ll be thinking of you and your poor tired feet.

  16. Dawn

    Ha! My teeth did the exact same sharky thing. Only one of them had to be removed by the dentist – the rest of the baby teeth fell out eventually. Relax and let him enjoy his extra sharky chewing power.

  17. Dea

    My puppy has the same shark teeth… he has 4 rows of them. Makes him really viscious looking, well as mean as a 4 lb chihuahua can look.

  18. kate

    Good Luck…I walked the 3 day last September it was alot but totally worth it! You are going to do fabulous!

    Oh and the dating site I was just wondering what people thought of it. I take it from this post it was totally not worth the money!

  19. Lesley

    Well, that was certainly good news that Mo up there had…hyeah, great news. [Runs to find string to forcibly rip out son’s loose tooth.]

    Best of luck, Mir!

  20. Sheryl

    I hope despite any blisters you have a great time. Walk on!

  21. Otto

    Otto posts when Otto feels. And, maybe, he posts elsewhere, Randi. B-)

  22. Missy

    Best of luck this weekend Mir. You make me want to be a better man, er…woman.

  23. Her Bad Mother

    Grown-up relationships with sane, heterosexual members of the opposite sex (if that’s your thing) are nice. Enjoy.

    And, enjoy the weekend. Have a great time.

  24. ben

    Um, ladies, that was OTTO posting up there ^^^^^^^

    I expected more swooning, somehow… ;)

  25. InterstellarLass

    Ah, improving your phone-love skills, eh?

  26. Aimee

    You=ROCK STAR. Good luck, have fun, and I can’t wait to hear all about it.

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