I want to tell you all about how I haven’t blogged because I’m having this fantabulous, exciting, and productive weekend. The weekend’s been okay, but mostly I haven’t blogged because I am lazy.

Last night I found myself trapped in a room full of Yankees fans. Oh, the horror. Watching those poor misguided souls cheering for St. Louis just because they’re sore losers… it was so pitiful. I assuaged my sadness with copious amounts of french onion dip and the occasional caring observation, such as, “You know the Cardinals are going to lose, right? I mean, you’ve prepared yourself for this eventuality?” Sure, I had a few things thrown at me, but at least I had the good sense to head home to watch the final inning in peace. That probably saved me from an actual beating.

Today I had to pick from amongst various invitations and ultimately did what everyone knew I was going to do–went to church and then came home and took a nap. I’m not going anywhere else. I’m all social-ed out for the weekend. It’s time to tend to all of the things I should’ve done during the week, and try to get them done before the kids get back tonight. I’m thinking–for example–that maybe I should put out the Halloween decorations. Of course, at this point, I’m so far behind that if I wait another week I don’t have to deal with them at all, and that’s tempting. But neither do I want to listen to an entire year of how I am the world’s most negligent mother because I never cleared a spot in the yard for the witch who rides the broom with a pinwheel at the end, either.

Yes, a witch with a broom that sports a pinwheel. Scary, no? We’re a regular house of horror.

We also have a little skeleton dude named Mr. Freaky. Mr. Freaky has light-up red LED eyes in his skull, and he dances and sings “Superfreak” with slightly modified lyrics. I’m a very spooky guy / The kind you don’t take home to mother. Monkey and Mr. Freaky are special friends; Monkey likes to imitate his dance and sing along, especially on the part where he goes, “Hey hey HEY HEY!” It’s a thing of beauty. And really, Mr. Freaky is the most normal guy I’ve ever had in the house, so I’m pleased to be able to provide a positive male role model for my son.

If you need me, I’ll be trying to pull apart my bagful of “scary eyes” window clings.