Not much has changed

By Mir
November 4, 2006

My scintillating discovery of the last few days: I like to say fiancé. It makes me giggle. I harbor a deep suspicion that if I say it too often, the Grown-up Police will come take me away on charges of false impersonation. Which is pretty funny, considering that I’ve been down this road before, have two kids, and by all accounts am pretty much an adult by every available definition. Still. Fiancé.

Feeeeee-on-sayyyyy. I don’t know, I will have to ask my fiancé. Let me discuss that with my fiancé. My fiancé wants a courtroom sketch artist. It rolls right off the tongue, followed by a decidedly immature giggle (or the tremendous effort required to squelch said giggle).

And as long as I’m giggling, I thought it’d be a really good time to try to convince Otto to tell me what kind of wedding ring he’d like.

Otto: So no one wanted to go to the camper and RV show with me.
Me: I would’ve gone with you.
Otto: I know you would’ve.
Me: I think it’d be fun.
Otto: Are you mocking me?
Me: No! I’m serious.
Otto: Okay, just checking.
Me: But I do feel the need to confess to you that while we’re talking, I’m looking at wedding rings online. I’m such a dork.
Otto: Yeah, um, we’re getting married, and you’re looking at wedding rings. I’m talking about campers, so I think I actually get to claim the title of dork, here.
Me: Good point.
Otto: Yeah.
Me: Ooooh. I just found one I think you’d like.
Otto: Yeah?
Me: Yeah, go get online. I’ll send you the link.
Otto: Okay. Huh. Yeah, I like that.

[10 minutes of swapping links back and forth while we make fun of various rings ensues]

Me: Here, look at this one.
Otto: I looked at that before.
Me: You did? This is a different site than the one we were just on.
Otto: Yeah… ummm… don’t look on that site anymore.
Me: This one?
Otto: Yeah, don’t look at anything else on there.
Me:
Otto: Go back to the other one.
Me: This is where you got my ring?
Otto: Go back to the other one.
Me: Morbid curiosity setting in… can’t stop… looking…
Otto: *sighing*
Me: I don’t see it…
Otto: *sighing*
Me: Here’s one that’s sort of like it, but without the emeralds… and it’s… oh my GOD please tell me you didn’t pay… okay, I’m closing this window.
Otto: I told you not to look.
Me: Yes. You did.
Otto: No retaliatory gifts allowed.
Me: RETALIATORY GIFTS?? What is that?
Otto: You can’t go trying to spend the same amount on me or anything.
Me: Right, because that’s the sort of thing I do. I try to get my revenge for you buying me something nice.
Otto: I’m just saying.
Me: Well I’ll try to restrain myself when I buy your ring.
Otto: You don’t get to buy my ring.
Me: Yes I do.
Otto: Why?
Me: Because it’s your WEDDING ring? And you buy mine and I buy yours? Because that’s how it’s DONE?
Otto: Really?
Me: Yes!
Otto: Well, you know, we have a lot of other things to figure out besides rings. Maybe before rings.
Me: Well, sure, like when we’re actually getting married. But this is easier.
Otto: True.

[more link-swapping and discussion of relative merits of various rings ensues]

Me: Oh! Here we go. This one is only $5200.
Otto: Are you saying I’m not worth $5200?
Me: Baby, you are TOTALLY worth $5200. But if I’m gonna spend $5200 on you, I’m gonna buy you a camper, not a ring.
Otto: I’m gonna need something to tow it with, you know.
Me: I know, honey.
Otto: I could probably find a camper and a car with a trailer hitch for $5200.
Me: Is this your way of telling me you’re never going to pick a ring?
Otto: I think the kids would like camping.
Me: I’m going to get you one of those weird pink rings with holes in it. Oh! Here’s one for just $6500! Good lord.

You’re all invited to the wedding, on an unknown date at an undisclosed location, where my fiancé and I will be exchanging vows and possibly camping equipment. Maybe afterwards we can talk him into barbecuing some chicken for us.

34 Comments

  1. Cele

    You two are very entertaining. Congrats

  2. Mary Tsao

    Congratulations, Mir! I’m so excited for you. What a great way to go into the holiday season — planning your new life with a great guy and the approval of your kids. Really, I can’t think of a better gift.

    Whee!

  3. Muirnait

    Life in your house will never be boring! :-)

  4. Judy

    HAHAHA!! I guess, “Mir, do you have the camper?” Or is it, “Lady, do you have the camper?,” would be a little hard to maneuver or otherwise work out the logistics.

    A marriage made in comedy heaven — you two will be together until you’re gumming your food together. Can you work that into the wedding vows?? :)

  5. Stjernesol

    Oh my!

    Love your writing!

  6. Lisa in NJ

    You know, you could always broadcast your wedding online. That’s all the rage now. Webcast!!!! I could you see you doing that.

  7. rachel

    Being married to someone who shares your twisted sense of humor is the best.

    Enjoy the shopping! (and I told my husband he could give me a laptop instead of a ring, but sadly it didn’t work out like that)

  8. MMM

    Haha. Too cute. You can tell that he loves those kids so much!

  9. Juliness

    Jewelry websites, rings, campers…it’s like that Sesame Street game; One of These Things is Not Like the Other. You’re too funny. And pretty. And your ring is shiny.

  10. Katie

    We went to a camper/RV show once. It’s definitely worth the price of admission to see a million dollar RV. Or even the “regular” ones that cost more than your non-moving home. But it has granite counter tops and teak floor!

    So are you guys registering at Outdoor World then?

  11. Otto

    You know, I never understood gift registries – they always seemed sort of, well, arrogant. “We don’t trust you to buy us something nice, so pick from this list, and then we’ll tell you we’re amazed at your good taste.”

    But I get it now …

    http://www.airstream.com/product_line/index.html

    or

    http://www.tab-rv.com/ (for the budget minded)

    And to tow it, I’m thinking

    http://www.jeep.com/crd/index.html

    Happy shopping – I know you will have excellent taste in your gift selections!

  12. Jill

    Wait, I don’t get it–why is he going to need something to tow his wedding ring with? Are you going to get him a really BIG ring?

    heh. Honest, I’m notoriously finicky about jewelry, and I out-and-out GASPED when I saw your ring–it’s soooooo lovely … so I’m not surprised it was … appropriately priced for its beauty. Also, appropriately pretty for your pretty pretty hand. Lucky guy.

  13. shannon

    just make sure if you spend that kind of money on a ring for Otto either A. he’s not a ring player wither (ask my husband how many rings we’ve gotten him in the 6 years we’ve been married…don’t worry, sterling silver for $20, each one) or B. yeah, can’t think of the B anymore.

  14. Aimee

    I’d be careful about issuing blanket invitations like that, unless you two want the entire internets showing up. ;)

  15. Linda Sherwood

    Budget minded? Otto, did you forget Mir has two kids? You’ll need something bigger than that tab rv. Unless you get a tent too.

  16. CharlestonGirl

    I am so happy for you! I think it’s adorable you like saying fiance. I got married September 16 for the first time in my life (at 42). I am loving that I can say “My HUSBAND will change your tire for you ma’am” or “I am waiting for my HUSBAND”. I just don’t get tired of it and yes, it makes me giggle like a little girl too! :)
    Enjoy the moment. Blessings, L

  17. Em

    Congratulations. I hope you and your fiancé are very happy. No doubt, your fiancé is a lucky man. But as you and your fiancé (getting tired of it yet? LOL) look at rings and RV’s, I’ll tell ya, we bought no engagement ring and basic wedding bands. The rest of our money was a trip to Hawaii!! And years later, still with no fancy rings, we do have an RV. :)

  18. Jenn2

    Have you ever noticed fiance rhymes with Beyonce? No, I have no idea why I read that whole post and came away with that particular tid-bit.

    Please don’t tell Mr. Clairol he could have had a camper instead of a ring.

  19. Susan

    I had a whole other thing to say, and then I got to Otto’s registry.

    Dammit he’s funny. May you keep each other laughing for many many years to come.

    Amen.

  20. Brigitte

    Maybe get a really cheap gold band at a pawn shop, then do one of those drive-through weddings in Vegas with the RV on a cross-country trip! (hopefully not too much like the movie “RV”)

  21. Carla Hinkle

    Do you remember the Seinfeld episode where some lady at a party can’t stop saying “finace” to Elaine, ending with “I have lost my fiance, the poor baby”? And then Elaine busts out with “maybe the dingo ate your baby.” I can’t get that scene out of my head now …

  22. Christina

    Still makes me giggle to say “my husband will take care of that”, 10 years later… congratulations to you both (again) I just can’t stop smiling for you :)

  23. punktastic

    My brother and his wife-to-be have a similar fascination with that word. In fact, apparently they’ve come up with a new game called “Chasey Fiance(e).” It’s a lot less X-rated than it sounds — and I figure if you can act like hyperactive six-year-olds together, you’re pretty set for the future.

  24. Joshilyn

    OH please post a link to the pink ring with the holes in it that costs mroe than a camper!!!

    Joshilyn

  25. Jackie L.

    I happened to pop in to check on ya and what do I find? You’re engaged! Congratulations! That is awesome!!!

    From what little I’ve read about Otto, you are perfect for each other. Enjoy the camper!

    :-)

    J.

  26. angela

    The camping equipment is a great idea. That way you’ll have both the ring AND the honeymoon taken care of with just one simple gift.

  27. Melanie

    I loved being able to say “fiance”. It had a great ring to it. Actually, I love being able to say “husband”, too. It makes me feel all grown-up and silly. I’ve been married 3 1/2 years and I still like to say it….

  28. Dawn

    Congratulations! I’m so pleased for you. Otto sounds wonderful. And sharing a wacky sense of humour is imperative in my world. There’s lots of things you might not be able to do when you’re 90 (What? I mean like… camping… ) but you’ll always be able to laugh together.

    And your ring is gorgeous, BTW.

    And thanks so much for the invite to the wedding. All I have to do now is find the right dress to wear and conquer my fear of flying. Which I might manage by, say… 2037 or so. So as long as you get married before then you don’t have to worry about a crazy Canuck showing up at your wedding. So that’s nice.

  29. Terri

    It’s so wonderful that you make each other laugh! My husband and I have been together since college (celebrated our 15th anniversary this summer) and we still laugh as much as we ever did. A sense of humor — and sharing the same type — has gotten us through a lot of not-so-fun times. May you always have that with Otto! And may you laugh together every day for the rest of your life.

    Your ring is beautiful, by the way.

  30. Elana

    Just to say, I’m in Ireland, so if you need anything, I can work it for ya.

  31. KAT

    I got engaged recnetly too so it’s been fun to see your posts going through the same process mine have (oh god, ANOTHER post about my engagement?!?) And I LOVE saying “fiance” with a thick French accent. I’ve been saying it so much that my fi-annn-saaaaaaaaaay told me I’m never allowed to pronounce it that way again for fear my face will stick like that. Congrats on your engagement!

  32. Hannah

    You should totally register for camping stuff. Just sayin’.

  33. Kestralyn

    Yes, please post the link to the “weird pink ring with holes in it”!!!

    And congratulations! I’m thrilled for you!

  34. Brigitte

    Hmmm, Dawn, I’m a transplanted Crazy Canuck . . . if the wedding stays in Mir’s current home turf, I can make it for you!

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