So my folks were here visiting for a bit, did I mention that? My father checked the blog one morning and then said, “Your readers aren’t going to like us.”
“Huh?” I said, because I’m eloquent and stuff.
“When we’re here you don’t blog,” he said. And then I laughed and laughed, because I barely blog when they’re not here, but I like that he’s willing to take the blame. Oh, I didn’t write here for several weeks? Totally my dad’s fault. Sorry.
Our house is laid out such that 1) our master is on the first floor with the kids upstairs (this will be important in a minute) and 2) although there are technically 4 rooms upstairs, only 2 of them qualify as bedrooms with doors and closets. I would draw you a picture if I could draw, but basically you go up the stairs and the bathroom is ahead of you, with a pass-through room and then a bedroom on either side. This means we don’t have a designated guest room, but as Chickadee has the larger of the two bedrooms (and the larger bed), she gives up her room for guests and sleeps in the pass-through room on Monkey’s side as needed. This is all preamble to explaining that I don’t go upstairs very often, and I almost NEVER go into the kids’ bathroom because I have a strong gag reflex, but before my folks arrived I checked Chickie’s room and then their bathroom and then I killed both children because they are unforgivingly disgusting and cleaning up the blood seemed easier than dealing with the mildew. (Just to give you an idea: Rather than attempting to clean the existing tub mat, Chickie threw it away and bought a replacement with her own money. THAT BAD.)
Everything got cleaned and we had a lovely visit. The end.
It did, however, get me thinking about how I view my children’s rooms now vs. when they were smaller and I still believed I could force them into cleanliness. HAHAHA. And then I got this very timely question about kids’ room privacy at Alpha Mom and mostly I was relieved it wasn’t a question about how to make your teens realize they are standing on a solid rectangle of mildew in the shower, because I don’t know the answer to that one.
You know, I don’t have kids, but I always like your advice and the level-headed tone you provide so much that I always read every word of your Alpha-Mom posts anyway. I’ve just realize that might actually be odd.
I’m the same way (as well as a non-parent by choice), but I love living a wee bit vicariously through Mir. She admits to not being perfect, and her advice and approach to parenting is so even-keeled and common-sensical (I make up words sometimes) that I enjoy reading everything she writes. Of course, that’s probably also a testament to her actual writing skills.
I don’t think it’s odd. Or, if it is, then I’m odd too!
I truly feel that your caring, respectful, and very logical way of parenting has gone a long way towards getting your children to their current stage of development. While I’m sure (unfortunately) there will still be bumps in the road, hearing about your children now, and the advice you give, gives me great reassurance as a fellow mother of a bright but quirky Aspie (8 years old).
Oh my gosh. You guys are the best. Seriously. <3
Reminds me of my time in college. Twice (twice!) we actually threw away all of our dishes instead of washing them by hand because it had gotten that bad.
Wait you mean the constant advice of “just have a very solid routine and a place for everything and they’ll learn cleanliness from you!” is BS?
What’s a “pass-through room”? Is it more like a den or like a hallway? Just curious is all!!
It’s a full-sized room but one that sits between the hallway and another room. So, the pass-through on one side is actually Otto’s office, and the one on the other side is kind of a communal space for the kids with the piano, a TV, bookshelves, etc. Each kid has to pass through one of ’em to get to their bedrooms, though.
We go in our teenagers’ rooms all the time but it is usually with the purpose to look for something they can’t find so they understand and expect it. I did find candy in their room when we had a no food in the room rule and got an impassioned plea for the secret emergency stash. These explains in part why we call it the non-secret, non-emergency stash now but we agreed to modify the rule to be no regular food or open candy and if you get bugs in room, you will exterminate or pay for same. It is mostly hard candy and some gum and so it was worth a compromise. Have not done well with the must throw away trash – the things on the floor are sometimes gross but this a battle I have put on the back burner given college apps, concussions etc and overall hard-working, very busy kids.