The only constant is change

Scintillating life development this week: I went to make myself a haircut appointment—as the weather warms up, my hair has begun to expand accordingly—and discovered that my last cut was… last April. Granted, I’ve been growing my hair out more or less ever since I stopped dying it and cut it all off a couple of years ago, but still. The fact that I went almost an entire year without so much as a trim is an excellent metaphor for the year in general. Don’t worry, I’m getting it cut on Thursday. For my next trick, I may even remember to have my teeth cleaned.

Anyway. While I’m busy indulging in self-care (HAHAHAHAAAA) I’m also thinking about my kids’ futures (because why not). I can take care of the haircuts and dental hygiene and whatever, but I would really like it if society would stop telling them they have to figure out the rest of their lives before they turn 18. I’m grumbling about it over at Alpha Mom, because that’s what I do. You know, between haircuts.


  1. Eliza Beth

    Hope you have a great haircut.

    Going to go read the article now:)

  2. Eliza Beth

    Hi again Mir,
    I think the idea is just to get them to focus on what they may want to do, but of course the school is making it far too rigid.

    Your point about your background is more like what happens.
    People TRY things, see if they like them, if it works for them for a number of years, and then they want to switch, they do.

    There are probably SOME kids who never focus or understand the importance of a career path, and the school is trying to reach them and then pulls the typical political hoo-ha by making it necessary for EVERYONE in that particular way.

    I knew what I wanted to do when i was ten. Did it until i was thirty (stock market); and then did an abrupt career switch into a totally different field for three years (master’s degree in psychology and m.f.c.c. internship) , ended up hating it; switched to another interest again for ten years (volunteering in an emergency room), got bored of that and have been into architecture and remodeling homes for the last 10 years.

    I think it is just having goals and interest that matters.
    Having the values that support you making effective choices.
    Knowing what you need to have as a foundation and making sure you have it.
    Doing what you love and doing it well.

    • Mir

      Oh, I agree, but shouldn’t this under-18 education focus on exposing them to as many options as possible? I just think we push FOCUS on them way too young.

  3. TC

    Absolutely. This bugs me in terms of college, where they’re being told that they need to choose a major before they even freaking ENROLL. It would make me way crazier if it was foisted upon them in high school!

  4. marianne

    OMG I totally agree!! I thought I was the only one that felt this way. I think it’s crazy that my 8th grader was supposed to pick a high school major and plan out her classes for the next 4 years! Who cares? Live, explore, learn, have fun, try new things!

  5. Peggy Fry

    I agree. I decided to major in music (with no formal education in it AT ALL!!!) then theatre. I think most people major in English or Social Studies because a degree in Princess isn’t on the list. Plenty of the girls I went to school with were obviously angling for that one. For all my education I was not prepared at ALL for the nitty gritty of working. I am a rounded person with lots of knowledge but I kinda drifted into a career in telecom. go figure. I think if truth be known, most people do drift into something. Even 22 is too young to lock you into a Life Path! We are all completely different people than we were at that age. Thank Goodness!

  6. Mary K. in Rockport

    Right on!! (Side note on the hair topic – I once had a roommate from France whose hair was just like mine, by which I mean bushy. When the weather got humid, she would look in the mirror, turning her face from side to side and making that pouty mouth that is so French, and say, “Oof. My hairs, they are too beeg.” Exactly.)

  7. Jean

    They used to say that the average person will change their occupation something like five or six times in their lifetime, which makes that message (“you must decide RIGHT NOW what you want to do for the rest of your life”) just absurd. It also means you are right on track for being average :-)

    Also–if a person has not experienced a wide range of things, what are the odds s/he can make a good choice of life path? Adolescence is all about expanding beyond immediate family and out into the world; it should be a time of exploration, of trying things out to see what fits and what one wants to keep and what was just fun for awhile and what one never wants or needs to do again.

    I suspect that what your district is doing may be in part a result of the fact that the only rationale for education that gets discussed publicly much these days is earning a living. Developmentas a human being (wisdom? What’s wisdom?) and citizenship, while still in the curriculum, have pretty much dropped out of the public conversation about education.

    Stepping gently off my soapbox now . . . (I spent almos all my own working life teaching, but the few other things I did were very important in leavening my understanding of what teaching is all about.)

  8. victoria

    conscientious objector lol

  9. Full Spectrum Mama

    Let’s get back to important things: what about those unsightly grays? It seems in order to not show roots I need to home-dye (and i’m not talking about some kind of $30, completely ineffective natural product stuff either) EVERY TWO WEEKS. Sure I have two Krazy Kids, one of whom is to my dread entering middle school with a strong case of hormones, doofiness and asperger’s and the other is on a path to macchiavellian world-domination, but we need to focus on what really matter here.

    • Mir

      I have to tell you, my life feels a lot more manageable since I decided to give up on color and embrace my gray. This may be how I ended up missing a haircut for a year, too, though….

  10. Ali

    Wow this couldn’t be more accurate! I am only 25 and don’t have any children but one of my roommates who is also 25 is a teacher and her school is considering turning into a fundamental school. Basically this means that kids are forced to pick an area that they’d like to focus on when they are in middle school. Are you serious? I’m 25 and still don’t know what I want to focus on, how the heck can we push this on a 12 year-old?!

    P.S. I’m a Floridian with more hair than a lion. Humidity and heat are my hairs worst nightmare but Defrizz by Bumble & Bumble is my savior!!

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