My doppleganger!

By Mir
October 26, 2012

There have been a few requests to see my actual zombie hand, though I realize this is a delicate matter for some. The day I got my new splint (which meant the bandages got cut off and I got to see it for the first time) I was super-jazzed to show it to Monkey and Mario when they got home from school that afternoon. To my dismay, when I removed the splint, Mario said, “COOOOL!” at the same time that Monkey gagged, turned away, and yelled, “PUT IT BACK ON, THAT’S DISGUSTING!” So, you know… your tolerance may vary.

Here, I’ll make it a link for those who dare to click: This was my hand this morning while I waited for the surgeon to come poke me and then take out my stitches. (Don’t say I didn’t warn you.) The stitches are out, now, and the good doc says everything looks great. Given how black and blue I am, I wonder if he has a different definition of that word than I do, but whatever. (I also told him I thought being bionic would be more exciting, somehow, and he laughed and said I probably thought it would hurt less, too. Come to think of it, he’s kind of a jerk.)

I’ve received some lovely, kind gifts while convalescing. Most of them involve chocolate, which is awesome. But this latest one is clearly the best.

The story Otto told me was that he spent a good chunk of the time while I was in surgery chatting with his brother, Nearly Nickless, who was kind enough to express his concern about the whole situation even from 1,000+ miles away. Apparently Nickless shared with Otto that he felt moved to get me a little something to help me through this difficult time.

A box arrived in the mail. This note was on top:

Oh, dear. Did he…? Yes. Yes, he did. This was wrapped in festive paper, below:

(Note that Luke just HAD to one-up me by losing his hand altogether. I can practically hear him asking me what the hell I’m whining about, with my pretty purple splint and attached hand and everything.)

Luke is now sitting on my desk, guarding my computer, reminding me that sometimes it only takes one hand to save the world. Thanks, Nickless. You really know how to cheer a gal up!!


  1. Megan

    Nickless just won the whole of today, and possibly tomorrow.

  2. Stephanie

    Oh, the bruises. Holy smokes. No wonder it hurts! Hope you’re on the mend quickly.

  3. Mert

    That was an awesome gift! I have similar pictures from my son’s bout of osteomyelitis and I find them really cool. He had sutures very similar to yours and they have healed so nicely and smoothly. You can only see the scars if you are looking for them. Speedy healing!

  4. Melinda

    I love it! I love coping with trauma with a good solid laugh. Best present possible. Now, heal up. May the force be with you, of course.

  5. Midj


  6. Lucinda

    Glad your hand is healing well. I have to say, compared to what my husband’s hand looked like after wrist surgery and 8 weeks in a cast that was too tight, your hand looks positively lovely. So, it could be worse I guess. I’m glad you shared. But mostly, I’m glad you’re healing.

  7. Brigid

    Ever use arnica cream? Works wonders on bruises. I’m guessing you’ll need the big tube. Going to look at the picture now. (I still think of you as Obi Won.)

  8. Michelle E

    Now that’s a cool gift for sure. About the bruising, when my husband had a bone graft, the donor site swelled up like a basketball. Turned black and blue, hard, hot and was truly amazing. He took some of Hyland’s homeopathic Arnica and the next day the swelling, heat, and hardness were gone. Really wished we had taken before and after pictures because I’ve never seen that dramatic of an improvement on anything before. It helps with the muscle pain also. Okay, assvice finished! Hope you and your bionic hand keep improving!

  9. Liv

    I agree with Megan. :)

  10. Ani

    1. Your hand is not disgusting.
    2. Cool gift. Nickless rocks.

  11. Angela S

    Amazing! Yeah its like your hand turned into a chameleon with all the different colors. Impressive. And yes, your brother in law wins…that is awesome.

  12. Tracy B

    I bet it looks even more disgesting with the stitches out. :) Speedy healing, Mir!

  13. Tenessa

    Best gift ever to someone with a hand injury!

  14. RL Julia

    Wow – it’s all the colors of the rainbow! LIke a Skittles hand!

  15. Erin

    Still feeling sick to my stomach because I went and looked…….

  16. CuriousCat

    Here I thought Otto was one of a kind. Then I find out he has a brother who is APPARENTLY as cool as Otto. Are there more? Is there a…a..colony of them??? Where is this place these men come from?

  17. StephLove

    I had a large second degree burn from a toaster accident on the back of my hand last Halloween and when it was all wrapped up in gauze it looked like a mummy hand, but I think yours is worse. I hope it heals well.

  18. Anna

    Wow. I think you need some zombie green nail polish to finish off the look you’ve got going there.

  19. Janet

    Thank you for making the link to your photo optional. The stories alone leave me pea green and short of breath. The photo would finish me off and my co-workers would wonder why I’m laying on the floor under my desk! (Yes, I’m fabulous while disasters are occurring, and yet nauseous when hearing about things that have happened in the past).

  20. dad

    I checked it out….and now I’m sorry.

    Is that really your hand?
    It looks like an old rubber glove filled with too much water.

    Hope you are feeling better.

  21. hollygee


  22. ruchi

    I think you should incorporate your hand into your Halloween costume somehow. Because that picture was definitely a bit scary. ;)

  23. Korinthia Klein

    That is every kind of awesome.

  24. sassymonkey

    giggle. I approve of this gift!

  25. karen

    Now why didn’t I meet one of the men in THAT family, I ask you.

    And I cannot believe your hand is.. like.. totally exposed… to the elements! To counter corners… to swinging doors!!…to happy ZOMG YOU’RE HOME dogs!!!… etc. etc. etc…. OMG! I hope you keep it some sort of inflatable protector thing, or something. Gah!!

  26. Mir

    OMGosh, Karen, NO! I’m still in a hard plastic splint. I was only nekkid to get the stitches out. My hand is NOT ready for prime time, don’t worry.

  27. Jessica

    I almost didn’t click (although, honestly, my grandpa and the wounds he’s had would make anything else look normal), but it wasn’t nearly as bad as you had me thinking (wound-wise). Yeah, it’s halloween-y, but it still looks like a hand. THAT Luke still has the options of hand or no-hand (cool hand?), so he’s still up on you in that his is removable and re-attachable? (Not so the “real,” but really not real one in the movie, I know.)

  28. Amanda

    Wow! I spit my water out my nose laughing at your awesome gift! Totally cool. Your picture is spot on for next week.

  29. Margaret

    That is the *most*amazing*gift*ever*! Having worked in orthopedics for most of my nursing years, nobody EVER got that cool a gift! Also, surgeons (and nurses) have an entirely different definition of “looks good.” (in the neighborhood of “well, given that you broke the bones and we cut your hand open and put a buncha metal in there, it really isn’t quite as pissed off looking as one might imagine”)

    Feel better soon!

  30. brigitte

    I expected far worse from the description. Monkey better NEVER Google infected brown recluse spider bites or flesh-eating virus!

  31. kapgaf

    There I was, looking at the picture and thinking arnica and there they were, all you readers saying use arnica cream, take arnica pills. Yes to all of it. Looks like it’s already healing nicely and the bruises are very impressive. I’m glad you took a picture for posterity (and the non-squeamish).

    Please tell Luke from me that I said “Luike, I am your Mother”.

  32. {sue}

    We have that Luke Skywalker! And can I tell you how many times I’ve located that lost hand, which is small enough to inhale? It’s MY superpower. I’m glad yours is actually still attached, otherwise I’d have to come down there looking for it.

  33. Daisy

    This took me back to a memory from college – a second degree burn on my left hand from hot oil (remember the old popcorn poppers?) the night before piano exams. Yep, I was a piano major.
    Hands tend to heal very well. I hope yours is one of those that follows the general tendency. Wishing you luck and less pain every day!

  34. Liza

    That. Is. Awesome.


  35. Deb

    So cool and looks pretty dern good, too, considering all it’s been through.

    I second the cool zombie nail polish!

  36. Frank

    Some cool thoughts about incorporating your hand into a Halloween costume:
    – put it inside a shoebox and label it: “This is what happened when the Addams family let Thing drive”
    – Add an extension the resembles a Hook… then add eyepatch, hat, and random ‘Arrrhg’
    – Ever seen Dr Detroit? position your hand/ arm in that manner, cock your head to one side, and loudly mumble a lot.
    – Add a dead leafless tree and hum the Monster movie matinee theme (kudos to anyone else who gets this reference)

    Hope it feels human soon….

  37. Victoria

    ”The Force is strong” in your family and the one you married into ;)

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