Have you seen this Kia commercial? I apologize in advance for the fact that the music will BURROW INTO YOUR BRAIN, but you really must see if if you haven’t:
I have just one thing to say about that, by the way: DO. DOP. DIPPITY!
Okay, technically that may be three things. And it also isn’t the only thing I have to say about it, because I’m a dirty liar.
Here is the thing about this commercial: At some point, somewhere, someone in a room full of executives said, “You know what this campaign needs? RODENTS. LOTS AND LOTS OF RODENTS. Preferably rodents who are totally rocking out and getting their groove on. And some of them should be riding down the street in toasters. Others, in washing machines. And some should even be in dishwashers.” And instead of taking that person away to a psych unit where he would no longer be a danger to himself or others, the people in that room AGREED, and soon, that there commercial was born.
And they’re all evil geniuses, because—while it hasn’t caused us to run and buy a Kia—this commercial has permeated our everyday lives, DAMMIT. The Kia hamsters now live on a giant wheel in my brain, and that wheel is all blinged out and constantly spinning.
I mean, think about it for a minute. There are EVER SO MANY life situations to which the addition of a good bass rhythm and a little bit of “You can get with this, or you can get with that” is the perfect accompaniment.
If I announce after dinner that one child should load the dishwasher and the other one should wipe down the table, and they start bickering about it, I need only start pointing to the left and right and asserting “You can get with this, or you can get with that. This, or that. This or that. DO. DOP. DIPPITY!” And in their mad scramble to PLEASE MAKE MOM STOP PSEUDO-RAPPING, the children complete their chores in a flash. It’s like magic.
A few days ago we got our annual AYP letter from the school district, the one that makes me roll my eyes and laugh a little. Basically, the deal is that if your assigned school fails to meet Adequate Yearly Progress two years in a row, the school is put into Needs Improvement status, and then we parents have the right to request that our children be transferred to a district school which actually met AYP.
I am ever-so-proud (um…) to share with you that my son’s elementary school and my daughter’s middle school both flunked AYP this year. The elementary school passed last year, though, which means we’re not yet in Needs Improvement status and not given the option to transfer. The middle school, however, has attained Needs Improvement and therefore a letter went out to tell us that we have the option to request a transfer…
… except that—OH, SNAP!—it turns out that EVERY SINGLE MIDDLE SCHOOL in our district is in Needs Improvement status, so, oh well, they won’t be offering transfers. (To clarify: We have no wish to transfer, nor am I worried. The dichotomy between the top students and bottom ones is huge and unfortunate, but I am actually quite pleased with the education my daughter’s getting.)
So, naturally, we read the letter and commenced with the “You can get with this, or you can get with that! You can get with this, or you can… actually not get with that. Oh.”
And then, of course, there’s only one thing left to say, you know.
DO. DOP. DIPPITY!