So romantic

By Mir
October 31, 2009

A few mornings ago, I let Licorice hop into bed with Otto after I let her out. She commenced furiously licking his neck, which—because we’d read some article that basically said, “You think your dog is kissing you when she licks your mouth, but really she is hoping you’ll vomit up whatever you just ate, just like her wolf ancestors would’ve done”—caused Otto to peer at her and say, “No matter how many times you lick my Adam’s apple, it’s not going to cause yummy vomit to come spewing out of it.”

We had a good laugh over that, because we are twisted individuals.

And then that night, lying in bed, there was perhaps a bit of smooching happening, and I kissed his neck, and he murmured, “I’m not throwing up out my Adam’s apple for you, either.” And I laughed until I choked, but seriously, now. I am going to have a big neon sign made up where I can just flick a switch, and the bedroom will light up with, “Foreplay: UR DOIN IT WRONG.”

13 Comments

  1. Rebecca

    I love the sign idea. Hilarious.

  2. Heather

    Ha! That’s one way to wreck a moment ;)

  3. Catherine

    Dogs R Funny. Once you start thinking like them, you’ll never be the same.

    Ask me how I know this. ;-)

  4. Tessa GJ

    Let me know where you can order one of those signs, because that is totally something that would happen in our bedroom, too.

  5. annette

    23 years of marriage and foreplay is totally figured out.
    All he has to do is…VACUUM(did I spell that right?) No need for any signs!

  6. BethR

    For some reason, this reminds me of the Saturday cartoon that pops up at The Devil’s Panties on a regular basis – “What not to say in the bedroom”

  7. Lori N

    Love it — my kind of humor

  8. Nicki

    That’s perfect! Can my sign come with a man? Otherwise…it’s just sad.

  9. MomCat

    Both LOL and Ewwwwwww!! I’ll never think of dogs the same way again.

  10. Heidi

    I think I just heard the school psychologist gasp.

  11. Sarah

    That was so funny! I didn’t see that article, but my brother did and mentioned it over dinner (before which my mom’s very tiny puppy was licking everyone)
    Enjoy!

  12. Brigitte

    Hee, Heidi!

    I think your family will be licked to excess on Thanksgiving, then.

  13. Katie in MA

    I’ve been reading WCS for years – so you’d think I’d know better than to read it while drinking my coffee. Now I wish I had a puppy so I could steal Otto’s line. :) Don’t think it’ll work without the pet…

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