Lost in translation

By Mir
September 20, 2009

You would think that—after nine and three-quarters year with the child—I would know certain things right off the bat, even those that require a bit of interpretation.

Like, say, that, “I may need a little help here” = “I just spilled an entire gallon of milk.”

Or that, “I had kind of a bad day today” = “Did the principal call yet?”

Or, in the case of this morning, that “My head hurts” = “I have a fever that puts my head at roughly the same temperature as the surface of the sun.”

Sorry it took me an hour to get you that Advil, kid. I really did think you were just thirsty when you said it the first time….


  1. StephLove

    Feel better soon, Monkey!

  2. feefifoto

    My daughter has always made declarations: “My cup is empty,” “It’s cold in here,” “I don’t have a fork.” I, her brother, the rest of her family, all of her teachers, and perfect strangers are expected to interpret this as “Can I have more juice,” “Would you turn up the heat,” and “Would you get me a fork.”

    I feel your pain.

  3. Half Assed Kitchen

    We’re the opposite. My son will say, “I just spilled a whole GALLON of milk!!!!!” when, in fact, it was a drop. Etc.

  4. Nelson's Mama

    My daughter called from school at 10:00 in the morning with a similar complaint, I took her some Advil and she still had it at 3:00 and a fever to boot.

    She sprouted a little piggy tail the next morning ;)

    Hope he feels better soon!!!

  5. hokgardner

    The surest sign my oldest daughter has a fever is that she gets a severe headache. Unfortunately, it took me a few times before I made the connection. I’d give her a glass of water and some tylenol and send her to lie down, only to find her sound asleep and burning up. Hope monkey feels better soon.

  6. J from Ireland

    Aw the poor little man. Hope he feels better soon. My 9 and a half year old son complains for every little ache he gets, its so joyful ;)

  7. just beaux

    Poor little guy. Hope he gets to feeling better.

  8. Brigitte

    Gee, didn’t y’all just get over a plague of some kind? Time for the second wave ALREADY!? You poor things. :-o

  9. Nicki

    Keenan’s been running a fever since yesterday morning. If you next write that Licorice had to go to the vet for the big ‘d,’then I’m going to start thinking we’re living some kind of freakish parallel life in the same universe.

    May Monkey get well soon!

  10. RuthWells

    Poor baby. My boys both ran very high fevers last week — hitting 103* in the 11-year-old. Luckily, it only lasted 1-2 days.

  11. Katie in MA

    I was trying to correct a similar problem at my house. The girls are CONSTANTLY yelling across the house. If I respond (by walking into the room, natch), I’ll get, “I’m hungry.” or “What can I do?” Yeah. This morning when my 5-year-old started yelling “Mommm!” as I was getting ready for work, I ignored her. And again. And again. Until my 3-year-old came running into the bathroom and declared, “Gwacie spilled her milk and broke her glass! ALL OVER!” Poor “Gwacie” was stranded in the middle of glass shards. Mom fail.

  12. Becky

    Laying on the couch with the new pup to snuggle will get him feeling right in no time! A popsicle or two wouldn’t hurt, either.

  13. mama speak

    I can always tell if something is up by looking at my girls eyes, they get glassy & the color of the whites is “off”. Maybe it’s a mom thing. I know, my mom used to say the same thing about me when I was a kid. Mine won’t even complain, I’ll just suddenly see their eyes & grab the thermometer, and a fever for sure. Hope it passes quickly & no one else gets it. This is a great time for Licorice to step in and make it all good. ;-)

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