I’d love to stay and chat, but I have to go make sure I packed underwear. You think I’m joking, but as we pulled out of the driveway last weekend and I started my traditional “I think I forgot something, I think I really forgot something this time” chant to Otto, he nodded and patted my knee, sanguinely, until we got to the end of the road and I started screeching, “WAIT! I DID! GO BACK!”
Oh, I know what you’re thinking—that I’d forgotten to pack underwear. But that would be silly. Of COURSE I’d packed underwear!
No, I’d forgotten to pack bras. Oops.
(In my defense, I’d just done laundry, and they were all hanging up to dry inside the laundry closet when I was packing clothes. Also, shut up.) (There is little a man enjoys more than having to tow a truck and trailer back around the block because his wife is too ditzy to adequately pack for a couple of days away. I’m sure of it.)
Anyway. Chicago! Let’s meet there, yes?
I’m off to BlogHer Business and then part of BlogHer, and I have never been to Chicago before (I KNOW!) and I fear I will spend my entire trip inside the Sheraton, flinging business cards around. Therefore I’ve decided to develop a list of demands requests to just put out there before I go, and then perhaps ala The Secret (or my own version of that, the hopehopehope method) all good things will come true. Yes? Yes. Of course.
1) You will be wowed and impressed by my hair, which I just had cut and de-gray-ified yesterday. Optional: Assuring me that I can deduct said hair appointment as a necessary business expense; pretending not to notice that my stylist dyed my ears brown.
2) I will be wearing exactly the right thing at every juncture. Even though I am old and cranky and lazy and GONE are the days of me packing seven outfits for three days. I have one outfit for each day. None of them are new or particularly remarkable, unless you count my smartass of a daughter telling me my ruffle-front blouse makes me look like a pirate.
3) My shoes will elicit oohs and aahs, and I won’t develop a single blister. Optional: Admiring my pedicure, which I did myself because I spent all my money having my ears dyed brown; asking how much I paid for said shoes, because you know I love a fellow cheapskate’s admiration.
4) I will neither spill a drink on myself nor say something incredibly stupid while talking to you. Optional: When I do, you will pretend to still like me.
5) Benevolent forces will ensure that I periodically leave the hotel and eat something yummy. (Feel free to be the benevolent force; I’m a terrible decision-maker when faced with more choice than the inside of my fridge.)
6) My new trial pair of contact lenses will behave. Optional: Telling me I look great without my glasses; reassuring me that I look fabulous in glasses when I give up on the contacts is bonus points.
7) I will not throw out my back carrying my ten-ton purse of “essentials.” Optional: Admiring my purse, netbook, or ability to carry all that crap.
8) I will do some work and networking, but also see old friends and make new ones. You will come up and introduce yourself and we will chat. It will be fun! Optional: Complimenting my blog, purse, hair or shoes is more than welcome; acting like I’m anything other than a complete dork is just sucking up.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go pack that underwear and bathe in hand sanitizer before getting on a plane.
If I were going to be in Chicago, I would definitely promise to do all of those things as well as tell you how PRETTY you are in person.
But since I’m not, I’ll just support you in spirit. Have a great time!
Have a great time! I wished I could be there!
LOL…did the same thing years ago, left my bras at home when I flew to California. But at least I got a day of shopping out of it ;-) Have a safe trip to Chicago! Enjoy the conference.
Have a safe flight and enjoy BlogHer! I always feel like such a blogging loser when I don’t go (which is…um…always)
Have a great time. And eat some pizza and a Chicago dog for me. (Hint: Don’t ask for ketchup on your hot dog, or people will know you’re a rookie. Learn from my (many, many) mistakes. You’re welcome!)Wish I was going, but alas, I have back-to-back birthday parties to host. I’ll catch up with your trip from the loony bin…
Have fun and don’t get arrested at CheezBlogher or whatever that party that Lindsay throws is!! Can’t wait to see a picture of you wearing one of those paper bag hats…
And by the way, those are darling shoes you have on.
I did that last weekend – packed everything I needed except an extra bra, then spent an entire day in the nearly 90 degree heat and sun. i felt really gross the next day putting that bra back on, and my husband just couldn’t understand.
Awesome things in Chicago that for various reasons you prolly wont get to… darn business meetings anyway(but that doesn’t make them any less awesome):
Good Deep Dish Pizza- would put you in ‘Bad-for-you’ food shock
Weber Grill Restaurant (THAT Weber Grills)- everything prepared on a grill (including dessert), but would send you into a sticker shock coma.
Close enuf to Wisconsin to get REAL GOOD Cheese, and Cheese Curd- why can’t you get cheese curd in the south??
Get to see Wrigley… for the history, not the creature comforts…
Reserve your spot on the glass floor of the ‘Tower-who-until-recently-was-named-Sears’
I wish I was going!
My dear freshly shorn, brown-haired, magnificently shod businesswoman,
Have a fabulously successful and enjoyable sojourn. Most importantly, come back to us safely, please.
Much love,
Mom
I wish I were in Chicago to meet you, Mir! I’d promise to love you regardless of your attire, drunkenness, or verbal slips! It’s what makes you cute, right? :)
Dang…I would do “almost” anything to be in Chicago but big city’s just aren’t my thing. Have fun!
Thanks for posting this. I’m off to pack my bras STAT.
What, we’re not all going commando? Just KIDDING!!
I will not be there to be your benevolent force, but here are yummy non-hotel places to eat:
-Giordano’s for pizza
-Portillo’s for Italian beef, Chicago hot dogs and/or chocolate cake
Chicago pizza is really as good as everyone says it is. I am getting all misty-eyed thinking about how long it has been since I’ve visited my family there and forced them to order me a pie.
I *live* in Chicago, but am not going to BlogHer because I don’t blog a whole lot. I totally want to hang out downtown this weekend and see if I see some of my favorite bloggers (but that sounds really creepy and I probably won’t do it).
PORTILLO’s, PORTILLO’s, PORTILLO’S!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If yer eating RED MEAT these days…PORTILLO’S!!!!!!!!!!
Wish I could be there to help fulfill your wishlist. I’ll just cheer you on from the sidelines, instead. HAVE FUN!
Um, I actually did forget my underwear for an overnight trip to Detroit recently. Let me just say that Walgreen’s is not the optimal choice for emergency panties.
Oh, and get somebody to take you to Hot Doug’s while you’re there.
People may laugh, but not me. You see, I’m a fellow bra-forgetter. I’m a tad large in that area (ok, more than a tad), so you’d think I’d remember. But week before last, we were heading to Denver for a few days, and I had to rush to pack at the last minute (trip got moved up a couple of hours). I was wearing a shirt with a built-in bra, so it didn’t even enter my mind that I’d need a bra. It wasn’t until that next morning in the hotel that I realized I’d forgotten a bra. Thankfully, the store I usually buy my bras at is a national chain, so I found one once we reached our destination.
I LIVE in Chicago!! Hot Doug’s is awesome, but only if you happen to show up on the right day.
Also, there are incredible concerts for FREE in Millennium Park!! And I make FANTASTIC picnics! Just let me know and I’ll show up! AND I’ll bring food! BTW those concerts are the city’s orchestra, and they’re amazingly good.
May I suggest that you bypass the overpriced tower formerly knowns as Sears and opt instead for the Lounge at the top of the John Hancock building? The drinks aren’t cheap, but the view can’t be beat and you don’t have to pay an arm and a leg to get up there.
I am told that the view from the ladies room is the best in the city. Never been in there myself.
I won’t be down at BlogHer, but I am glad you’re coming to our great city. The people here are really nice. And we will absolutely love your hair.
(And FWIW, I think glasses are WAY more sexy than contacts.)
You don’t need several bras for a weekend…just rinse it out in the sink with a little shampoo and you can wear a clammy, still-smelly undergarment the next day! This has the added benefit of making the homecoming doubly welcome.
Last year we were on the way to my husband’s grandmother’s funeral and we get to the hotel the first night – I realize that I can not find my lingerie bag. Mind you we were driving from IN to upstate NY with a 10 month old and my husband’s sister and that I had packed the car, my husband, my daughter and myself (and made my sister in law repack as I needed room for me to actaully be in the car. Thank goodness we went past a Nordstrom and it was the half yearly sale. Best of all – my husband found my lingerie bag in the bottom of the suit bag on the way home.
Enjoy Chicago
I did forget underwear last Thanksgiving. We had to stop at a mall somewhere along I-95 in Connecticut. At least there was ice cream…
Pizzeria Uno – or Pizzeria Due the next block over, Portillo’s for a Chicago dog – order a Jumbo Dog with Everything, and Nick’s Fish Market, order the Lobster Bisque.
If you get your picture taken at Blogher for some publicity purpose or to post on one of your blogs, then yes, you can absolutely write off the hair appointment cost. Just sayin’.
I am heartbroken that I never ran into you. But it wasn’t for lack of trying!
And also, I managed to not make a fool of myself all weekend which I will now solely attribute to the fact that you said you didn’t see it happen.