That’ll learn him

By Mir
September 11, 2008

This morning I am off to the 3rd grade breakfast, where one Monkeypants McGee will be part of “Are You Smarter Than a 3rd Grader?” Only one kid was picked from each class, so naturally we’re very proud and can’t wait to see him smoke a few of the other parents.

Last night we were going over practice questions, and he kept having trouble with the branches of the U.S. government and types of rocks. He kept insisting the government was made up of the Executive, Jubilant, and Legislative branches. Which was sort of adorable. (But wrong. The beatings helped, though.)

Finally, we were just about done, and I said, “Oh, by the way, Monkey… WHAT ARE THE THREE BRANCHES OF GOVERNMENT?”

He straightened right up and proudly declared:


I think he may be on to something, frankly.


  1. Sara

    He’s definitely on to something. Smart Boy!

  2. Flea

    LOL!!!! I think he’s right.

  3. Sillycakes

    That child is BRILLIANT. Seriously.

  4. Tress

    So he IS paying attention! Nice work, Mir!

  5. Heather

    Haha! Great job, Monkeypants! :D

  6. Neil

    There would be a whole less fighting between the political parties if the concern was just over the Jubilant.

  7. Maki

    Kids say the smartest and funniest thing!!! How clever is he!! Really, you should be proud, Mammy:)

  8. Debra

    That’s so awesome!

  9. Katie

    *snort* Too funny! You should be very proud. :)

  10. Megan.

    It certainly explains the collection of fossils ’round some parts.

  11. diane

    Heh. Confusing Congress with rocks? Priceless indeed.

  12. Marlen

    Cute! That boy is a funny one. Gets his good sense of humor from his momma!

  13. All Adither

    Or the SEDENTARY.

  14. dad

    When I run for President, I want him for my running mate.

    Dad/Monkey 2012!
    Maybe that won’t work. I’ll be too old and he’ll still be only 12.

  15. Heather

    HA! That totally cracked me up! Good luck Monkey!

  16. Michelle

    Haha.. seriously.. best accidental joke ever.

  17. Susan

    If I were Monkey’s teacher, I would totally give him credit for that answer. Way to go, Monkey!

  18. Sheila

    I bet he pictures a filibuster as some sort of mining operation…

  19. Ani

    And the sedimentary branch…it rocks. Ha ha. I geeked even myself out.


  20. RuthWells

    When is comes to the U.S. government, are you sure it shouldn’t be “sedentary”? (Rim-shot! Tip your waitress!)

    (Oops, I see All Adither beat me to it.)

  21. Tammy

    No Monkey, that’s the “SEDENTARY” branch. ;)

  22. Trisha

    Out of the mouths of babes!

  23. Jenny

    That… just explains so much about our government.

  24. Stephanie Chance

    Speaking of kids saying the darnedest things, one day my daughter asked me what type of bug something was, and I answered, “I don’t know, I’m not an entymologist.” Later that day I asked her something, and her smart butt said, “I don’t know, I’m not a” and she tried to say entymologist, but it came out sounding very like proctologist. So now whenever someone asks a question we answer, “I don’t know, I’m not a proctologist.”
    And this will show how nerdy I am. Sometimes we play a game where we find big words in the dictionary, I will read them to her, and she will try to pronounce them. We’ve actually rolled on the floor laughing at some of her attempts. She will grow up regarding the dictionary as an endless source of amusement.

  25. Aimee

    Ha! Sedimentary. You know, that explains a LOT. I’ve said that it seems like this politician or that one seems like they have a head made out of rock, but I was joking.

    Or was I?

  26. Astrogirl426

    Steven Colbert, watch your back! lol

  27. Katie in MA

    I think we should give Monkey and Chickie a Late Night Show for kids. It could air at say…8/7c. On Nick. They would totally rock the ratings!

  28. Rachel

    I’m totally voting for Dad/Monkey as write in candidates in November!!! = ) I love your blog & your family rocks (ha! I wasn’t even trying to do that pun!!)

  29. Keyomi

    that is sooo cute and funnY!!

  30. Jamie AZ


  31. Karen

    I love it!

  32. HM

    What a talented boy…he’s going to take them all down because ten bucks says most parents can’t even answer this question! Cool!


  33. ChristieNY

    OMG! I just spit my iced tea onto my monitor! That is one funny Monkey! I can’t wait to hear how he smoked the grown-ups today!!! <3

  34. Kailani

    True story fellow teacher told me today:
    Kid: Mrs., how do you spell “penis?”
    Teacher: What?!
    Kid: How do you spell “penis?”
    Teacher: What are you trying to write, honey?
    Kid: Well….I already have the “hap-,” now I need to know how to spell “-piness.”

  35. Randi

    LMAO – too good! He’s definitely on to something – how did he do?!

  36. Susan

    He’s wise beyond his years, that Monkey!

    And, Kailani — you need to submit that to Reader’s Digest or PARENTS magazine or something. That is priceless!

  37. Cele

    I think he should get points for editorial content.

    I thought it was judicial, two idiots, and a bunch of idiots.

  38. LiteralDan

    Sedimentary pretty well describes Congress over a long period of time now. We’ve gotten about as much meaningful legislation out of them as a pile of rocks.

    But I don’t think anyone has looked at a stodgy old Supreme Court Justice and had the word Jubilant spring to mind, unless it was time for lunch after hours of hearing testimony, or Bush appointees had some Constitution to rewrite!

  39. sunny

    Sometimes the things you write about are so funny and/or cute, I think you made them up:-)

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