Wow, you people have a lot to say about corn. And eggs! Yes, I agree that my eggs didn’t peel well because they were too fresh. I actually KNOW that you’re supposed to let them rest in the fridge for a week or so before you boil them (and I love that, because what’s the alternative? You put them to work scrubbing the inside of the fridge? You throw a wild egg party where they overexert themselves?), but that would require knowing an entire week in advance that I want to make deviled eggs. I cannot commit to that sort of advance planning.
Thanks for all the corn recipes, though. I have determined that I shall use corn in tonight’s dinner. Somehow. But that’s as far as I got. I’ll figure it out later. Maybe. If I remember. What were we talking about, again? Also, has anyone seen my watch today?
I keep taking my watch off and leaving it places, so the children have taken to bringing it to me whenever they come across it. This morning Chickadee gave it to me, and the only problem was that I actually KNEW where it was before she did, but then I put it… somewhere… and now I can’t find it.
(Is it becoming clearer, now, why I cannot plan ahead for my deviled eggs? Honestly, my family is lucky I remember to brush my teeth every morning.)
I will be spending the day sitting here at my desk, which is about ten feet from the door, waiting to pounce on the FedEx guy. He had the nerve to try to make a delivery yesterday while I was in the shower, and when I discovered the “sorry we missed you” hang tag on the door I was a very sad woman indeed. You see, I finally ordered myself a new computer.
(If you have a burning need to know more about the whys and hows, I wrote a bit about this already, but the Cliff Notes version is that I currently own two computers, one of which is dying slowly and the other of which is dying quickly.)
Anyway, after checking the online tracking it became clear that I had missed delivery of my new IPOD, not of my new COMPUTER. So I was less upset, after that. Plus I was then disinclined to drive out to FedEx myself to pick it up.
BUT I think the iPod AND the computer might be coming today. So I will sit RIGHT HERE until the FedEx man returns.
[Digression: I am not even sure what to do with an iPod, except maybe I could use it to ignore the children more efficiently? But there was this whole back-to-school deal thing where I bought a new computer and then they insisted I take a free iPod and a free printer and maybe a puppy as well. I’m not sure, because by then I was overwhelmed and huddled in the corner telling Otto to just “figure it out” because there were TOO MANY CHOICES. But I am still rather put out that the black Macs cost more than the white ones, too, so believe you me I’ll be giving that MacPuppy a stern talking to about color discrimination when it arrives.]
I’m a bit nervous about switching over to Macdom, but the Blue Screen of Death drove me to it.
Last week the children and I made an emergency grocery run to Walmart. Now, I hate Walmart with a fiery passion, but we happened to be right near it and it was close to dinner and Otto was working late and so I succumbed to the big yellow smiley face. I regretted it instantly, you understand, when I ended up standing at the deli for over thirty minutes just to buy some cheese. This isn’t SUCH a big deal, I guess, except that THERE WAS NO ONE AHEAD OF ME. I just got the slowest deli person on the planet.
Otto has NEVER been to this Walmart, because he also hates Walmart, but has better courage of his convictions than I do. And has never had two really hungry children in his car when he was near it. Anyway, he’s not been there, is my point.
So the next night at dinner, the children started talking about the GIANT DOG at Walmart, and Otto had no idea what they were talking about. Well, there’s a display of Coca-Cola products there topped by a ginormous ceramic Uga which is disturbingly life-like other than the fact that it was about 15 feet long. I found myself trying to describe it:
“Oh, it was incredibly ugly. And REALISTIC! I mean, it was ANATOMICALLY CORRECT!”
Otto blanched, and the kids immediately started asking what “anatomically correct” means. I explained and they still looked confused, so finally I said “He had a giant scrotum!”
The children claimed to have forgotten what a scrotum was, so I found myself deep in a discussion with them about testicles, and happened to glance over at Otto just in time to see his head explode. And then he suggested that perhaps this was not appropriate dinner conversation.
(Hey, I was keeping it clean. I didn’t even mention that the giant Uga is not ENTIRELY anatomically correct. He has an impressive ball sac but NO PENIS. Because giving him a penis, THAT WOULD BE WEIRD. But no problem giving him the world’s largest ceramic balls. Right.)
Anyway, I had to concede that this just MIGHT not be good table talk, and we moved on to something else. Later that night I found out that this piece I wrote on table manners was live, and the irony, oh my, it was delicious. I do loves me some irony.
Plus, I don’t have to decide to make it a week in advance.