Not very bright

By Mir
February 12, 2007

God, I am so stupid sometimes I want to just grab a frying pan and hit myself in the face. It is only slightly comforting that none of my frying pans are cast iron, but Otto says I am not allowed to live in the south without a good cast iron pan, so I had best do all of my face-smacking now before I buy something I could really break my nose with.

Today I did two things with the very best of intentions, and I am already kicking myself.

First, I filled out one of those ubiquitous online “Give us some basic information about your move and you’ll be contacted with estimates!” forms. Within an hour I’d received two phone calls from gruff-sounding men with names like Cletus and Groundhog wanting to know whether I own any furniture over 8 feet long. Isn’t that a rather personal question?

No matter, I quickly made a date to be hacked to bits in the morning, er, to have a walk-through weight estimate in the morning. And it’s a good thing, too, because then I received MORE phone calls and several emails and everyone wants to know how much my stuff weighs and when, exactly, I would like to move, and DUDE, I have no idea.

Truthfully, I also have no idea how much of this stuff is going with us and how much of it is going on Craigslist with headlines like “My Crap Can Be Your Crap!” This will depend quite a lot on how far the moving companies tell me to bend over and what the next house is like.

Which brings us to the other stupid thing I did.

There is a house on the real estate site Otto and I have been using that I keep returning to, mostly with great frustration because it’s on our “possible” list and it doesn’t have a lot of information in the listing. Well today I was looking at it AGAIN because, who knows, perhaps I could WILL IT to tell me more, and guess what? It worked! I discovered a little button labelled “TOUR” and that button took me someplace else entirely—a wonderful world of panoramic room views and square footage calculations and an actual street address.

And then my fool self fell immediately, madly, deeply, and completely in love with this house. My fool self then forwarded the link to Otto with the kind suggestion of CALL THE REALTOR IMMEDIATELY AND GET YOUR ASS OVER TO THIS HOUSE.

Which: Go on, you can say it. “Oh honey, no.” It’s February. My house is under a contingent contract and Otto’s isn’t sold and we haven’t even bothered getting preapproved for a new mortgage yet and blah blah blah BLAH. This is not the time to become infatuated with a house.

Even if it is in the right neighborhood with the good schools. And has space for my office. And a gorgeous yard. With a gazebo. A GAZEBO.

I have a feeling it’s going to be kind of a wild four months, here.


  1. anna

    Here’s one vote from a total stranger. Go for it.

  2. Heather

    Ooh I hope you can get it, if it’s what you really, really want!

  3. Melanie

    Love is love is love – you can’t stop it. The house is probably meant to be, right? I guess just cross your fingers and hope…?

  4. InterstellarLass

    The next time I move I hope to get out with about 10 boxes. No more. I don’t really need all this stuff do I?

  5. Cele

    I am assuming the next time I move it will be by Tsunami. I hope your move goes well. The four months waiting would kill me. I hate waiting.

  6. Chris

    I’m telling you hang on to that Otto. He rules.
    Good luck with the whole house and moving thingy. It will all work out, cause you’ll just will it that way.
    I seriously love your posts! ;)

  7. DDM

    Well….you willed the ‘additional information’ into being….I’m just sayin’.

  8. daring one

    There is nothing stupid about falling in love with a house. Now just don’t expect it to love you back or give you anything for Valentine’s Day. I fall in love with houses I can’t yet own, graduate programs I can’t attend, solid surface countertops I can’t afford all the time.

    Just remember. There are plenty of gazebos in the South and one of them has your name on it. I’m sure you’ll use it a LOT. Maybe one of the houses will have a gazebo that IS an office. Huh? Huh? Awesome, eh?

  9. Jennifer

    I fell in love with a house last year. The consequences were disastrous. I earnestly hope it works out much better for you.

  10. Lady M

    Lady, this move was meant to be. Already having an offer on your house and finding a new one? Wow. Fingers crossed for you.

  11. MMM

    The perfect house?? Hmmmmm….maybe Otto will have it inspected and there will be esbestos. No? Well, I tried.

  12. Contrary

    We’re actually moving to New Hampshire and have been looking at and falling in love with houses online for several months now. The only problem is that we’re not moving for another couple of years. So basically, we look at houses, fall in love, and then move on to the next one. It’s a sick little game we’re playing down here.

    (I hope everything that needs to happen for you to get that house happens exactly the way you need it to)

  13. Kimberly

    Hasn’t this whole thing been a leap of faith anyway, Mir? Go for it! Carpe House!

  14. Randi

    The same thing happens when you go car shopping and fall in love with a car but can’t have it. But hey, at least this house will give you a basis for comparison. And who knows? Maybe the owners will be like you and not moving for a few months!

  15. Sara

    Otto is right. You must have a cast iron pan and season it well. How else will you have fantastic cornbread? Plus, it’s a handy weapon to have on hand when Cletus and Groundhog come over to give you estimates and tell you to bend over.

  16. Bob

    should the unmentionable happen, I’m sure Otto will be more than willing to build you a gazebo. or a screen porch – which is much more practical here-abouts.

    I’ll b6et he could even put a car or two up on blocks and an old washer on the porch to make you feel like you’re in the REAL south.

  17. LadyBug Crossing

    Let me tell you a quick story…

    We were moving here. I had 2 days to find a house. I had surfed the internet for 2 months and kept coming back to this house. It was well beyond my price range. The weekend we came to see it – they had dropped the price $100k. (It had been way over priced before!!) We saw a lot of yucky houses, but this one – this was it! We bought it. We love it. It has some issues that we are fixing a little at a time…

    When you see the right house, you just know.

  18. Kris

    Keep Monkey home from school. If they get out of line he can question them to death. *snurk*

  19. Aimee

    Good lord, lady! Seems to me the year of living changerously is all about pursuing your dreams wholeheartedly. Go for it, I say! GO FOR IT!

  20. JayMonster

    When we bought our house, we did a similar thing. We decided that we had to have it. As things go, everything took time, getting the mortgage etc, but in the end we got it. It can all work out. Just stay positive.

  21. Sophie

    It’s just like the old song: “Houses are just like street cars. Another one will be along in few minutes.” Or something like that. Hang in there, in limbo land.

  22. alala

    It’ll be okay. I fell in love with a house before our old one sold, and I had lots of anxiety attacks about it and wasted a shameful amount of perfectly good worrying, and in the end we got it anyway. These things have a way of working out.

  23. Heather

    Otto is right, you MUST have at least one cast iron skillet. I would recomend getting one of the really big ones so that you can use it for many things. BTW you are in luck most of the skillets today already come seasoned so you do not have to go thru that pain.

  24. Amy-Go

    You know you can put a contingency on it, right? Nothing ventured, nothing gained…;)

  25. BOSSY

    Bossy always falls in love with her houses utilizing your same urgency: “We’ll take it for thirty thousand over the asking price with no home inspection — and not a penny less!”

  26. tammy

    Hey, at least you’re in love with something reasonable like a gazebo. I fell in love with our house over a bread drawer. The heart wants what it wants.

    Also, I like my cast iron skillet quite a bit, much to the dismay of my Yankee ancestors.

  27. Susan

    The house two down from one of my best friends is for sale. It’s in the right neighborhood, it has a home office, it’s TWO DOORS DOWN from my friend. Every day I have to WILL myself not to call the realtor and say SHOW ME AROUND! Because until we sell THIS house, there will be no new house.

    So yes, I feel your pain.

  28. Rachel May

    I agree with the cast iron skillet, though not for bonking oneself on the head. For cornbread and many other delectable southern gourmet delicacies.

    I also agree with the sentiment that you will get the house you are meant to get. God literally dropped ours in our collective lap. We weren’t even looking for a house, and… ta-daaaa! Here’s a house!

    I know you will find the house you are meant to have. Until then, stop praying for patience. It’s really just asking for situations in which you have to practice it.

  29. Carson

    It’s yours. The internet will make it so.

  30. Dawn

    You had me at gazebo.

  31. Heidi

    Rachel May wrote: …stop praying for patience. It’s really just asking for situations in which you have to practice it.

    Rachel May, you are indeed a wise woman.

  32. David

    Say, did you know that if you panel the outsides of a gazebo with corrugated tin it makes a dandy storage building? *big ol’ grin*
    Also? Once you’ve done some work-out routines with your new cast iron skillet, you’ll be able to frisbee it at me whenever I offer such helpful hints. *grins again*

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