Otto said perhaps it was a self-portrait

By Mir
November 13, 2006

I had this completely insane but good and productive day, but right now I need to sleep more than I need to write.

I just have to tell you this one thing.

When I went to the oil change place today to explain to them about my transmission fluid being low and my oil gasket having run off and why that meant that they should pay for the repairs I had to have done at the dealership, the assistant manager (while we waited for the manager) tried to explain to me how they check the fluid.

He drew me a picture of a dipstick.

A picture. Of a dipstick. In case I didn’t understand. See?

It took everything I have not to make a Sad Barbie Pout at him and wail, “Math is haaaaard!”


  1. meghann

    hmm, maybe you should have drawn him a picture of what you were going to do with that dipstick if they didn’t pay.

  2. InterstellarLass

    HA HA HA! I agree with Meghann. That’s damn sad. Dude needs a lesson. I hope you gave it to him.

  3. Plain Jane Mom

    Go Otto — very funny line!

  4. Melanie

    Poor sad Barbie. I hope the man and his confusing diagram didn’t make you cry…..
    So did you rip him a new one and get your money back plus some?

  5. Muirnait

    Otto is funny. But I had to read it a couple times to get it. I can’t wait to hear the whole story of what went down at the oil change place.

  6. Irene

    you lost me at oil change place…

  7. Patricia

    Um….did you draw him a detailed picture of the oil gasket — since he apparently has no idea what one of them is?

    Is this like Full Contact Pictionary?

  8. Bre

    I hate being the stereotype, but man I would have had to send my daddy in there for me because I am miserably helpless when it comes to doing anything with my car other than driving too fast and parking too close to the curb. So, did they relent?

  9. TW

    That man is a dipstick! Good grief. I hate those oil change places. (at the same time I really hate changing oil myself)

  10. David

    I understand a dipstick can make a very handy whip. Perhaps you could manage to whack the guy across the face with it as you wheel around to ask him, “Is this it?”

  11. Karen Rani

    That would have been SO funny!

  12. Bob

    alternatively, you could have told him where he could put his dipstick. and the oil filter gasket. and his drawing.

    I wondered what that mushroom-shaped cloud on the horizon was. It was his little mind after you snapped.

  13. Teri

    You should have explained to Mr. Assistant Manager that he wasn’t talking to his girlfriend and that you didn’t need diagrams to understand what he was talking about.

  14. Ani

    And then you said. “yes, dipsh*t, that IS a dipstick. NOW WHAT DID YOU DO WITH THE GASKET?!?”

    And then casually dropped a line about contacting your attorney and the BBB. Loudly. Within the manager’s earshot.

    I do so hope they didn’t try to placate you with coupons for free service. Ick.

  15. Aimee

    Otto’s funny. But seriously, NOTHING makes me angrier than condescension that’s aimed at me. I give you a lot of credit for not going all Barbie on him, and even more credit for not going all Crouching Tiger on him.

  16. Jenn2

    Mr. Clairol has offered you a tutorial on the many fun ways to make a man cry using only a dipstick. Oddly enough, he has not offered same tutorial to me. Hmmmmm.

  17. Katherine

    I would have said, “Oh, thanks. I’ll be sure to show this to my lawyer when I sue you for cost repairs plus sexual harrassment for drawing my a picture of your tiny dick.” :)

  18. Minnams

    When I was in college (many years ago), I took the Jeep I was driving then to one of those ten-minute oil change places. When I drove it back to school a few weeks later, the filter fell off, and my engine seized up and completely melted down. My father (who owned my car) sued the oil change place (if you’re wondering which one, think popcorn brand) for the costs of re-building the engine. He didn’t sue for attorney’s fees, he didn’t sue for anything other than the exact cost of the engine repair. I had to appear as a witness in three trials, since big oil change company fought back with their sleazy attorney, and we won each time, and by the third time, I was in law school and was able to define “negligence” much more clearly. I am never going to those quickie oil change places again.

  19. Daisy

    “Math Class is hard?” !!! You need to check in with the old Barbie Liberation League.

  20. Karen

    I’m sorry Mir that you were subjected to such an idiot…but I have to admit…it is a funny story!!!

  21. Her Bad Mother

    What’s so funny? Math IS hard.

  22. fin

    He drew a self-portrait, huh?

Things I Might Once Have Said


Quick Retail Therapy

Pin It on Pinterest