You know, this whole Blogging for Books thing has been a LOVELY little contest that sometimes brings out amazing and/or unexpected pieces of writing from the far corners of the blogosphere. That’s not even mentioning how actual! published! authors! have been stepping up with their time and their shiny, shiny books as prizes. I myself really luuuurve my copy of Mother Shock that I won, um, back in the Pleistocene when we had the first B4B contest.
ANYWAY! You must go read about this month’s Blogging for Books contest and then you must 1) tell all your friends, 2) enter, 3) tell some more people, and 4) try not to snort your beverage of choice when you get to Joshilyn’s astute observation about condoms which has nothing to do with the contest but still, is quite amusing. Last month the contest wasn’t all it could be and I know there are plenty of us who would be sad to see it die. So. GO! Read! Enter!
Also, I’m aware that this isn’t much of an entry. It is late and I am tired and Chickadee was home from school today. For the first half of the day she obligingly lay on the sofa, warm with fever and sipping juice and watching cartoons. For the second half of the day she looked for new and interesting ways to bug the everloving CRAP out of me, and might I just say, that girl is a PRODIGY. So. I am trying to finish up WORK work and do not have time to tell you about my laundry and whatnot, other than to point out that I think I washed everything I OWN today. That will have to tide you over (TIDE! get it? GET IT??) for now.
Oh! But! Extra special bonus below the fold….
Hypothetically, if you were going to eat a meal in a restaurant with someone you wanted to impress, what would you order? Not as in, what food will look impressive, but more as in, which food is least likely to get stuck in your teeth?
Discuss.
I don’t usually comment, but since you were home with a sick kid and have specifically asked for input, I’d like to do what I can to help out. I’d order fish. First, you like it. It won’t get stuck in your teeth. It’s not boring like chicken, won’t bring up a carb discussion like pasta and isn’t hard to eat like shellfish. Ordering fish just seems like something a discerning, well informed person might do. Can you check the menu online before you go?
I’d order something that is impossible to spill on me. No soups, no sauces, something easy to cut up and chew, and that will not fall off the fork. Fish is always good, but be careful with salad. No matter how neatly you eat, something always flys into your lap causing a disgusting oily spot on your boobs.
Hmmm…I had this exact same dilemma last week. For me, it was breakfast. I choose the biscuits and gravy.
I think you’ll want to stay away from anything you have to bite with your front teeth — ribs, sandwiches…Definately steer clear of soups or anything with a sauce. Personally, I’d steer clear of fish as well because what if he wants to kiss you and you’re all fishy-breathed and stuff? Of course, if this is a job interview (like mine was) and there’s not a possibility of a kiss then fish would be an okay choice.
Good luck!
quarter pounder with cheese.
who needs pesky 2nd dates anyway.
What kind of restaurtant is it?
I kind of like the fish idea. Seafood in general seems pretty neat, easy, and non-stick-to-the-teeth to me… quite manageable as long as you stay away from things that require the use of Tools, like crab and lobster.
Tide…good one Mir. My mom always told me go with the salad – I use lemon wedges instead of dressing (hang up from my weight lifting days) it doesn’t leave an oily stain. But if you don’t want it to stick to your teeth go for french fries and pudding or jello – hey Monkey would agree with me
Okay those choices probably wouldn’t lead to a second date… so ignor that.
Now, I grant that I am coming at this from a server perspective and a slightly different take than the other commenters, but get what you want. If you want to start with a salad, get a salad – don’t wait to see what the other person is doing and then do the same. Or if you don’t want a salad, don’t be pushed into it.
Just be happy with whatever you order, especially if it’s a date. An interview or something may be different, but for a date, you’ll have a better time if you’re excited about what you’re eating. And people who enjoy their food always come across as more fun than people who don’t.
See?? I told you! White things!
MAZEL TOV, SUCKER!
Do NOT order anything with cilantro or any of those little green flecky spice things…They will ABSOLUTELY get stuck right at the top of a tooth, so that it looks like some horrid green critter is making it’s way out of your gum.
Broccoli is also not a good choice, especially if it makes you pass gas.
Um.
But I would KNOW about that, of course.
WOULDN’T know. I WOULDN’T know about that.
WOULDN’T.
WOULD NOT.
To impress a man? On a first date? Room service. Order room service. *Ducking* ;)
Wine. Just wine. It won’t get stuck in your teeth, and all worries about unshaven legs will disappear 1/2 a bottle in. ;-)
Of course, if you actually want to CONVERSE with your dining companion, this may not be the way to go.
I just KNEW you were Deedle!
I’m with Allison. Just get what you want, and be yourself. And if your self WANTS something with out cilantro, herbs, spinach and broccoli, then so much the better and you won’t have to worry about green things in your teeth!
Fish breath? Pshaw. Bring mints! You’ll be FRESH for kissing.
Ribs, slathered in BBQ sauce, with corn-on-the-cob and perhaps some baked beans.
A bottle of wine, (for me it might be two).
OR
Oysters on the half shell always leave an impression on a first date.
Crap, I used the “D” word. Sorry. I meant – leave an impression on a dining companion.
Wish to impress? No stains? Easy to pick at but still get full enough so you don’t attack the refrigerator like a procrastinating squirrel one day before hibernation when its over?
Grilled chicken with mixed veggies…and I’m certain you don’t like broccoli. At least right then.
*looks at clock*
See?
*looks at clock again. It hasn’t moved*
See how patient I’m being? I’m dying to know what you had to eat!
*taps foot, but patiently*
I have to agree that fish is the smart choice, plus it makes you look like a grownup. Avoid salad at ALL costs. Baked pastas are okay,but be careful. But, I’m throwing my vote to the room service option. yep, I’m a floozy.
God,I’m so glad I’m married.
TIDE – I get it – it used to be a washing powder
and .. re the food .. apples don’t get stuck in teeth much. Avoid haggis
Oooooh, who are we impressing?!
Steer clear of anything where you’d have to make a split-second decision as to whether to use fork or fingers: no pizza, fries, sandwiches, or burgers. Sorry! Don’t go with pasta because you’ll SPILL SPILL SPILL, plus who can do the twirly-fork thing anyway? I’d say no salad, because then you’re all HELLO I’M A GIRL, I’m TRYING TO LOOK LIKE I DON’T EAT ANYTHING which is just lame.
So maybe a white fish and veggies? Like, grouper or tilapia or wahoo? (Bonus points: fun to say! Depending on how much wine you’ve had by then, could be ordered as wahoooooooooooo!) No spinach. Not worth the worry.
I have abysmal table manners. According to my husband my family eats like we are in prison. It is true I always finish before everyone else. For this reason, I would be inclined to order something I don’t like so I dont’ devour it like a savage beast as is my wont.
However. Not getting what I want in a restaurant always makes me cranky. And to impress people you also have to be charming. So that won’t always work.
If you have a similar problem here are some things not to order. (1) Salad: Falls off fork. Gets stuck in teeth. (2) Pasta: Same reason. Inclined to fly from the untensil during dramatic gestures (3) Things that are oily. They make your face shiny and that can look weird. (4) Things that involve lots of cutting. If you are me, this can lead to disaster. (5) Anything floppy or sloppy. I tend to leave a ring of food around my plate then. Fish can be floppy. This can also be a problem.
(6) Wine. I am a booze hound and will drink myself into a pleasant stupor no matter what is at stake if the wine is good enough. (7) Desert. I might lose control and scrape each last bit from the plate. (I do know enough not to actually LICK the plate.)
That leaves french fries. Except I don’t like french fries.
So the one thing I can eat without too much mishap is really firm mashed potatoes that stick to your fork. Shrimp are also pretty manageable for the clutz and so safe.
Another option is to imagine that people are impressed by the carefree joy shown by a person who eats with abandon. Then, just go to it and assume you will be admired for your ability to eat with gusto.
Booty Food is a GREAT book on this very thing (and I’m not just saying this because my name is on the cover). My advice: stay away from long pasta like linguini; small game-y birds and the like that can accidentally be flung across the room a la Pretty Woman; and anything prone to splattering. Onion soup is a big no. I say, order the steak. Especially if it’s a man you’re trying to impress. Men dig chicks who eat.
You know, I am getting so old! I read this post and thought, “Hmmm…Blogging for Books…wonder what that is? It sounds familiar, though. I wonder where I’ve heard of it before? And then after I clicked on the link, I realized that I’VE JUDGED THE DARN THING in the past. Geez, my memory is just not what it used to be!