In addition to having handily disposed of not one but TWO websites today (if only I could harness my powers for good), there are now further technical difficulties which necessitate the absence of a real post for tonight.
And by “further technical difficulties,” I of course mean “I am still laboring over an assignment due in the morning which I have somehow not yet completed; unless the person reading this is my editor in which case it is totally already done, no worries at all, and by the way have I mentioned lately that you are pretty because you totally are.”
In lieu of a real post, have three random snippets from my day:
1) My father has requested a Monkey story. So let’s blame this on him. This morning I heard a blood-curdling wail from upstairs and I dropped the toast mid-buttering and ran to see who was bleeding. My reward?
Monkey: MY BUM FELL IN THE TOILET!
Me: *trying not to laugh* Um, how did THAT happen?
Monkey: I don’t know! I was just sitting here! And then it was in the potty!
Me: I see. Well. Was it, um, attached to you at the time?
Monkey: Yes! But I didn’t do it!
Me: Okay. Let’s just clean you up.
Chickadee: You fell into the toilet? That doesn’t seem like a good way to start your day.
Me: THANK YOU, VERY HELPFUL.
2) I saw a woman running out of McDonald’s with a cup of coffee–obviously very important and in a great hurry–hop into her 2006 Saab and drive away. Lady, unless you stole that car, I’m thinking your “turbocharged attitude” can probably afford Starbucks.
3) Later, I passed an unremarkable car whose license plate read AEIOU-Y. I didn’t know the driver, but I think I love him a little bit. You know he had to be singing Conjuntion Junction, What’s Your Function? in there.