(With apologies to Stacy and Clinton for butchering their line with a double negative.)

So remember how I said I was thinking of making t-shirts and stuff? I think about lots of things, really. It doesn’t always mean that I’ll actually do it. This, though, I was seriously planning to do, although as we all know, I can’t even draw a straight line, so it wasn’t like I was planning anything very nifty. And we all know that Mrs. Kennedy has already cornered the market for pure-text, one-line-zinger blog shirts.

It was something of a quandary.

And then I was visited by an angel. That’s right, an angel of the lord! If, you know, the lord was a great big repository of the sort of artistic inspiration which I lack.

My angel came in the form of the incomparable Leanne Wildermuth. Leanne swooped in with some wonderful ideas, and some even more wonderful sketches, and before I knew what was happening, suddenly there was a perfect rendering of my kids. I mean she captured them in such a way that when I showed her work to a friend of mine, the first thing she said was, “Wow, that’s AMAZING.” After a moment, she added, “And CREEPY. But in a GOOD way!”

Indeed.

And armed with artwork like that, I just couldn’t keep it to myself. I said to myself, “Self,” I said, “who wouldn’t want to wear this, or perhaps slurp coffee out of it? Why, NO ONE, that’s who! No one with a SOUL, anyway!” And it was off to the drawing board to design some Woulda Coulda Shoulda merchandise.

In addition to suffering through fifty-seven nitpicky back-and-forth emails with me, Leanne was also gracious enough to act as quality control. I sent the first shirt to her for approval. Her verdict? It’s good! (Her other verdict, which she was too kind to express? Oh THANK GOD that WEEKS of PESTERING have finally come to an end… go sell the damn shirts, already.)

So here’s the deal: You can now purchase a variety of Woulda Coulda Shoulda shirts for adults and kids. Adult shirts have text on the front (two options currently available), and small artwork between the shoulderblades on the back. Kid shirts have the large graphic on the chest, with text on the back. There’s also a great big mug, suitable for filling up with enough beverage to last you through an entire blogroll. The adult shirts will change periodically; these first ones will be around until early December or so, and I’ll put up new ones in time for Christmas.

The store is open, so have fun shopping. Also? You’re pretty!