Gah. I started this whole thing about people feeling the need to be pointedly hateful and blah blah blah and you know what? No. I’m saddened when I’m misinterpreted, especially by people who lack information and, it would seem, enough happiness to keep themselves occupied. But as someone was kind enough to point out to me, they have to live with themselves forever. And I don’t.
So! I may in fact be the anti-christ according to something like .1% of my readership, but I will continue to do what I damn well please (maybe twice as much! so there!) because there’s just no pleasing some people. Those of you with a sense of humor and a little empathy and–here’s the important one–the ability to keep your head out of your or anyone else’s ass? Are pretty. The end.
But I still don’t think I have anything very interesting to talk about today. Oh well!
Yes, today has been a day of deep reflection and consideration. And pajamas. I offered to take the kids on An Outing and gave them several possibilities, and they unanimously decided that what they really wanted to do was… stay in their jammies all day. And play with all the sofa cushions. Wooooo! Good times.
While my children dismantled the family room, I was free to do other things. Like the dishes. And going through the pile of mail on the kitchen counter. And considering whether or not to cut off all my hair.
I’m kinda going with this transformation motif, you know. I figure I may as well remake myself in as many ways as possible. Also, I’ve been wearing my hair in a ponytail for the entire summer. Because I’m incredibly lazy. But I haven’t had short hair since I was maybe twelve. And what if I hate it? And look terrible? And how much energy can one person waste on their HAIR, for cryin’ out loud?
Stymied on the hair issue, I decided I needed to turn to more important matters. Like designing a t-shirt for the blog, because I am jealous of some cool people who have nifty t-shirts for sale. And I might sell… ummm… a couple of them, and then I’d have money for… uhhhh… gum.
… did I mention I’m thinking of cutting my hair…?
And then, I got a phone call about my bone density scan. All is well! My bones are lovely! All that ice cream is giving me the calcium I need. And for just a moment, I was disappointed. Yes. Because earlier I’d been having a conversation with someone about funny-sounding words. And did you know that BEFORE you develop osteoporosis–the full-blown “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” type of bone weakness–there’s actually this other thing which is halfway between that and normal, and IT’s called osteopenia. I don’t WANT to have osteopenia, but it’s so bizarre and vaguely pornographic-sounding, you know? I could’ve made an entire entry out of that, I’m sure of it. But my bones are normal. Damn them.
In conclusion, I’m afraid I haven’t been using my powers for evil today at all. Maybe tomorrow. (Feel free to hate me just on general principle until then.)
P.S. Monkey managed the first organic milk spill, today. I beat him soundly with a two-by-four and locked him in the basement for the rest of the day. Oh, wait. I just cleaned it up and asked him to be more careful. I’m really going to have to work harder on the malevolence thing.