Kudos to Hallmark for creating a day when people are obligated to express their love to those they cherish. Why settle for spontaneous, heartfelt declarations when you can have calendar-dictated purchasing of greeting cards, I say!
By the way, before anyone gets their panties in a wad (although I certainly hope they are satin panties with little hearts! For the love of all that is consumer-oriented!!), I wrote this post last night and future-dated it. I’m not blogging from work. As this is being published, I am probably napping at my desk.
Kidding. We have free coffee and it’s good. I couldn’t nap there if I wanted to. Also I think I’ll set this to publish at lunchtime. Go ahead; you read and I’ll eat my sandwich.
Where was I? Oh! Right. Love.
I can remember a Valentine’s Day when I was alone, and I dressed in black and spoke my disdain for the day and hung out with fellow singles and was fine.
I can remember a Valentine’s Day when I was with a man who tried very hard but consistently missed the mark. I was pleased that he tried.
I can remember a Valentine’s Day when I was alone and I didn’t want to be, and despair colored the edges of my world.
I can remember plenty of Valentine’s Days with my husband where I reminded myself that he was a good man and I tried to convince myself that the complete lack of romance in our relationship wasn’t a big deal.
I can remember a Valentine’s Day when the man I loved told me that he wondered if I didn’t love him more than he loved me. It turned out he was right.
I will remember this Valentine’s Day as one that came and went with no outward fanfare. I will remember that my daughter snored quietly as I pulled the blankets up over her the night before, and that my son had an endless grin and icy feet when he climbed into bed with me in the morning. I will remember that someone occupied my thoughts in the best possible way, and that I was on someone’s mind as well. I will remember that I presented the “pizza for both lunch and dinner” snafu to my children as if it was planned and a huge treat.
I will remember it as the year I learned to risk and to let go sometimes, and relearned to love and be loved.