My town is so small

By Mir
December 7, 2004
Category Friends

how small is it, Mir?

Well, lemme tell ya.

My town is so small, I just had the following experience:

Answering Machine: Hi Mir, this is Friend You Haven’t Spoken With For A While, we were wondering if Chickadee would like to come home on the bus with Daughter tomorrow and play. Let me know.
Me: Chickie, do you want to go?
Chickadee: Yes! Yes! Please!
Me: Okay. *dialing phone*
FYHSWFAW: Hello?
Me: Hi, it’s Mir, I got your message.
FYHSWFAW: Oh, hey! Good!
Me: So, thanks, Chickadee would love to come over, that’ll be great. What time should I come get her?
FYHSWFAW: Oh, I don’t know, what works for you–
Me: I can come whenever–
FYHSWFAW: –I know you’ve got your big date tomorrow, so this way you don’t have to rush off to meet the bus!
Me: Oh, that’s not a problem, we’re only going to lun–
*crickets chirp loudly, albeit perhaps only in my mind*
Me: Wait. No. Wait. How do you know I have a date tomorrow??
FYHSWFAW: Oh, doesn’t everyone know? You’re the talk of the town!
Me: Um, what??
FYHSWFAW: Oh, relax. You’re only the talk of our street. Honest.
Me: Oooookay….
FYHSWFAW: The talk of the bus stop, you might say. I’m sure there are a few people who don’t know, though.
Me: Oh. my. God.
FYHSWFAW: No! Don’t be upset! We’re all really excited!
Me: Must go. Put head. In oven.

Note to self: Small town, neighborhood party, meeting someone’s brother-in-law? Good. Small town, neighborhood party, entire neighborhood discussing said meeting of self and aforementioned brother-in-law? Bad.

18 Comments

  1. Marcia

    I thought maybe that all of your neighbors knew about your blog. I can see how that wouldn’t be good. Then all of your deepest thoughts would be circulating around the village.

    No pressure about your date or anything…

  2. RockStar Mommy

    That putting your head in the oven thing has really bitten me in the ass in the past. You might want to watch that. And really, don’t sweat it…
    They could be talking about you MUCH worse!
    Have fun on your lunch date :)

  3. alektra

    SO cute. This is so cute. Thanks for sharing, because this totally made me smile.

  4. Ben

    FYHSWFAW: Oh, relax. You’re only the talk of our street. Honest.

    That’s not what she told me.

  5. Dawnie

    Suddenly, I am thinking there is something to be said for living an anonymous, introverted, quiet, lonely life with the cats.

    At least she was trying to help…?

  6. rudolf

    LOL!!!

    There is a VERY fine line between caring about how your neighbors are doing and gossiping.

    And it sounds like your neighbors are WAY over that line :-)

  7. kym

    Hey.. the blogosphere is like a small neighborhood too right?

    Good thing… cause I was pimping you to some single guy on some blog I was reading. In a very nice way of course.

  8. Sheryl

    Geez, who told?! Also, when your alone at night and you sneeze do you hear choruses of “bless you” from down the street?

  9. chris

    I live in a similar sort of small New England town.

    I told one person I was pregnant and the next day someone ten people removed from this person called to congratulate me and tell me I was the talk of the party they were at the night before.

  10. Gina

    Brings back memories of my old hometown. I finally got everyone to quit talking about me when I moved away.

    It could be worse. At least what they are gossiping about is TRUE! LOL!

  11. elswhere

    Hey, it takes a village to…um…well, to gossip about your lunch date, apparently.

  12. JuJuBee

    Suzy told me, you know…from Oak St.? Yeah, she heard from Lucy who heard from Jane. They are wondering what you are going to wear.

  13. Vics

    I had a whole host of comments in my head till I read sheryl’s Now i’m too busy wiping the juice i snorted over my screen to think.
    I cant wait to hear what they all tell you about the date itself *grin* reckon there’ll be a photographer..?

  14. Ben

    Okay, in my world it’s Wednesday, and it’s getting close to lunchtime. So I hope you’re having fun. Can’t wait to see the 6:00 news…

  15. Michele

    Just your town? oh no, I heard about the news in a local blog….that is in Canada! Yes, your date has crossed borders. Now I must go tell my neighbours living in Quebec, they love small town gossip.

    Have fun! And please return to tell us EVERYTHING!

  16. MZM

    Grew up in a town like that…Good luck cause they’ll know how it went before you know…heheheh

  17. Amanda

    Hey – now you know how Paris Hilton feels – famous and all!

  18. Hula Doula

    We heard the gossip all the way here! It’s not just your town that’s talking hon!! LOL!!
    At least you have a hot date!!!
    Hope you have fun!

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