So this vampire walks into a bar…

By Mir
October 10, 2004

Yeah. Um. I’m kinda hoping Jay gives us a slightly more upbeat topic for next month’s contest. Despite the myriad of stories from which I struggled to choose just one example of my grappling with insanity (yes, just trust me, I had lots of choices), it would seem that my last post left a thick cloud of The Serious in here.

And–believe it or not–having completed the piece, gotten it out of my head and off my computer, I am not in the mood for gloom. Time to lighten up.

So! A riddle, of sorts.

What do you do when you’re at church, lining up with the choir, and are suddenly accosted by an 80-year-old woman gushing about your outfit in the following manner: “You look SO ADORABLE in that, and I’m just looking at you thinking that if I wore the same thing I would just look so frumpy and dowdy, but on you it is SO ADORABLE!”

Well, if you’re me, you murmur a hesitant thank you–wondering if perhaps you heard wrong, or she doesn’t realize how incredibly backhanded that sounds–and consider never wearing that outfit again, and then turn to the pastor for rescue. He has heard this exchange and the moment your gazes meet, his mouth twitches. With no further ado, you both succumb to a mutual and decidedly unholy giggle fit.

Even the House of God isn’t impervious to my force field of farce.


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