I had a wild date last night, and I’m paying for it, this morning.
We smuggled drinks into the theatre, you see. We passed the bottles back and forth while we giggled, and by the end of the movie? The popcorn was gone, the bottles were empty, and we were up way past our bedtimes. Flying high on our mischief, I guess you could say.
This morning? My head is screaming in protest. Church was out of the question, in my sorry shape. (Cue the lightning bolt.) I’m dragging around and feeling my age… twice my age, that is.
So, if this were a story that included another adult and maybe some groping? It would’ve been totally worth it. In reality, this is another one for the “no good deed goes unpunished” files.
Yesterday was cold and rainy. The kids and I spent our day doing a whole lot of nothing. Well, they had swim lessons in the morning. But other than that, not a thrilling day. They were tired and cranky and so I came up with this brilliant idea to have a little bonding time. So we went out and borrowed the “Home on the Range” DVD. After dinner, we had showers and changed into pajamas and set up our “theatre” in the family room. I popped the kettle corn, and Chickadee insisted that we drink water out of bottles like you get at the actual theatre. Okay.
We turned out the lights, snuggled on the couch with a blanket, and watched the movie. And shared two bottles of water. And stayed up late.
Have I maybe mentioned that the kids have been more or less perpetually sick since school started?
Perhaps when your kids aren’t feeling well, they sleep. My children view illness as a great reason to get up a little early. Like, say, two or three hours early. Monkey’s little sniffle of last night has morphed into full-on honking this morning. Chickadee is leaving soggy tissues everywhere. And I am offering up sacrifices to the sinus deities, bargaining and praying for the ability to breathe through my nose again. At least it was easy to convince myself that the choir wasn’t going to miss me this morning.
Trust me; on this alone I could’ve built a solid case for self-pity. It’s one of my specialities. But my life? Is like one of those commercials for Ginsu knives. But wait! There’s MORE! You also get… a bizarre delayed allergic reaction to last week’s wasp stings! These impressive monster hives will coat most of your leg, drawing disgust and fascination from your offspring! And to go with this lovely bonus gift, you also get… no adult benadryl! Enjoy scarfing down half a box of children’s benadryl while scratching and scratching! (Bonus chorus of giggling, snot-sucking, and chanting of “don’t scratch, Mama!” may be purchased separately.)
I shudder to think what might happen to me if I went on a real date. Wait, my mistake. That wasn’t a shudder. Just a tremor from the benadryl. Nevermind.
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