That much cutesy cuteness, all in one incredibly cute place doing a cute presentation? Should be illegal. At the very least, they should offer lemon slices or decontamination or something on the way out to help you restore a more natural ph. Kindergarten graduations are not ph-balanced. First they saturate you with the ultra-cutesy-cuteness of a giggling gaggle of 5- and 6-year-olds, then afterwards they ply everyone with cake! At bedtime! They should have been giving out insulin with the diplomas.

So we sat and watched, and I took a million pictures (oh, look, there’s Chickadee with red eyes… there’s Chickadee with red eyes, chewing on her hair… there’s Chickadee with red eyes, poking the kid next to her… there’s Chickadee with her eyes shut, waving at me…), and maybe got a little teary, and spent a lot of time trying to convince the Monkey that the world was not, in fact, going to end if he was not the the center of attention right this very second in the middle of everything. Oh, and, the ex and I made nicey-nice. Cuz it was so damn cute and sweet in there, we couldn’t have been rude to each other if we’d tried.

The only problem was when Fun Daddy decided to let the children run wild afterwards, and didn’t pay much attention to the time, and then I had to be the heavy and reel them in on my own and try to get them home and put them to bed. Wow, deja vu… it was just like being married again, except this time I didn’t have to bring him home with me! But I digress….

We survived, and the children are asleep or smart enough not to let me know they’re awake. I’m cobbling together the final bits and pieces of the teachers’ gifts and cards. And also thanking my lucky stars that I don’t have to go through this again for another two years. I may have recovered, by then.