[A guess of what my 11-year-old daughter’s journal would surely look like, if she had one.]
Friday, December 18th 2009
I let Mom come to school with me this morning to carry my stuff. There was a lot of stuff AND it was raining and I got wet and I hate that. She was pretty much okay except when Ms. Science told her I was missing part of my project. Then I’m pretty sure she would’ve gone into full lecture mode if we hadn’t run into the next teacher who needed cookies. Ugh!!
We didn’t do anything at school really. And tonight we’re eating dinner in front of the TV and watching Mythbusters, which is cool except I wish my brother wasn’t going to be there.
Saturday, December 19th 2009
I slept soooooooo late today! IT WAS AWESOME! I hate getting up early.
Monkey and I played a bunch of Wii today and it was actually kind of fun until Monkey started freaking out and then Mom made us turn it off. He ruins everything. And whatever he doesn’t ruin, Mom ruins. So maybe I went upstairs and hassled him a little and then she sent me to my room because she’s TOTALLY UNFAIR. So now I’m in here thinking about how much I hate everyone.
It’s later now. We got take-out for dinner and rented a Shorts (which was HILARIOUS) so I guess I forgive Mom for being so mean. Also we got to stay up late so YAY! I love vacation!
Sunday, December 20th 2009
I am going to kill Monkey. I am going to put my hands around his little neck and squeeze. He totally got me in trouble by making up some story about how I wouldn’t lend him my book. (I mean, yeah, I wouldn’t lend it to him BECAUSE IT’S MINE and maybe I was kind of obnoxious about it but did I mention that IT’S MINE?) He got so upset that maybe I called him a couple of names and then Otto came in and yelled really loud.
Otto never yells. I mean Otto NEVER yells. So then I yelled. And then Mom came up to see what was going on and then I got sent to my room.
So now I am going to have to kill Monkey, because this is ALL HIS FAULT.
Vacation sucks. I’m not allowed to say “sucks” until I’m 14 but this is my journal so SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS. I want to go back to school and hang out with my friends. But I’m stuck in my room.
Okay it’s bedtime now, and I got to come out of my room and talk to Mom, and she asked me why I’ve been being so rotten. And I told her it seems like Monkey is getting a lot of attention and it makes me feel kind of neglected. So we talked a while about how to fix that and she was kind of nice about it. But she did point out that being rotten is only going to get me sent to my room (and less attention) and I felt kind of stupid that I hadn’t thought of that, so I complained about Otto yelling at me. He and I talked, too. It’s okay now.
We watched Akeelah and the Bee tonight and Monkey and I clapped when she won. It was a super good movie. Plus we got to have giant bowls of popcorn!!!
I love vacation! And I guess my family isn’t so bad.
Monday, December 21th 2009
What. The. Hell. Okay, I’m not allowed to say “hell” at all, probably not even when I’m 14, but HELL HELL HELL HELL. Also: DAMMIT. Yes, DAMMIT.
Mom was so nice yesterday night and then she took me to the orthodontist this morning and they held my mouth open for like SIX YEARS and put braces all over my teeth. My teeth were FINE. They were! And now I have these stupid braces and I hate them and they hurt.
And Mom said I’ll get used to them but she clearly hates me and did this to punish me.
When is vacation gonna be over??? I want to go back to school so I can tell my friends how awful my life is.
P.S. Mom said she’ll make me some pudding. Butterscotch, even. I guess it could be worse.