Just be there, even if they sleep through it

This past weekend was Chickadee’s Fall Break from school, so she came home on Friday afternoon and is headed back today. Four entire days to love on my girl! Four entire days of quality time and family togetherness!

Sort of.

She got home around 4:30 on Friday and went to bed. She got up around 9:00 and had some dinner and watched TV with me for a little bit, then went back to bed. She slept until 2:00 pm (!!) on Saturday, then headed in to work a shift at 4:00, but then came right back home because they’d double-scheduled, and… went back to sleep. Sunday she slept until 1:00 pm, had some food, then went to take a nap. She was up to watch the debate with us on Sunday night. Monday she got up early to drop her car off for a repair, then Otto brought her back home and she went back to bed.

I dunno. I think it’s POSSIBLE she’s not getting enough sleep at school. Just a theory I’m working on. Call it a hunch, if you will.

We did get to spend some time together this morning. (Hooray for annoying little brothers; Monkey had to leave for campus at 7:30 and woke her up to say good-bye.) She helped me with today’s post for Alpha Mom, and I know this is going to come as a HUGE surprise, but I could not be more proud of the self-possessed young woman my daughter is becoming. I’d love to take the credit, but I suspect she’s just naturally awesome. Anyway, from her and from me, have a very happy National Coming Out Day today.

12 Responses to “Just be there, even if they sleep through it”

  1. 1
    AlisonC October 11, 2016 at 12:00 pm #

    Not that it matters but there are complete strangers across the world who are pulling for you Chickie and love you for who you are

  2. 2
    Kim October 11, 2016 at 12:07 pm #

    Oh wow, Mir! I’m surprised, but not shocked, somehow. You do such a good job of walking the line between being open and honest and protecting your kids’ privacy. And it certainly puts the bullying into some perspective. Poor back-then Chickie, she was dealing with so much, and she came through so strong and wonderful.
    “not my place to ever bring that up—even obliquely—in any setting where I don’t know if that’s common knowledge.” Ooh, this line bumps right up against my ADD, and has done ever since I’ve known gay people. To me, it’s just another side of normal, so no big deal, but I forget that it certainly is to a lot of people, and if I slip up, it can be a huge problem.
    My youngest, who’s 6, vacillates between wanting to be a boy and being fine with being a girl. She got a buzz cut this summer, and absolutely loves it, and she tends towards boy clothes. I can tell we’re in for an interesting ride, both in terms of her own journey, and in the reaction of others. Both her grandfathers strongly disapprove of her hairstyle, and it took a lot of self-restraint not to text “it is not her job to look pretty for you!” at them this weekend.

  3. 3
    The Other Leanne October 11, 2016 at 12:41 pm #

    This makes me feel so good about the future. You do you, Chickadee.

  4. 4
    Brenda October 11, 2016 at 12:51 pm #

    I remember feeling so guilty that my mom drove four hours to pick me up at school and then had to drive the entire four hours back because I fell asleep right away and slept the whole way home. College is exhausting.

    Many thanks to Chickadee for helping with your post. It was a good reminder to me that just by being open and introducing a variety of topics into my regular life I can help create space for people to share what they want.

  5. 5
    Linh October 11, 2016 at 1:17 pm #

    She is amazing and you SHOULD take (at least some, but I think, a lot of) credit for that. :)

  6. 6
    Brigitte October 12, 2016 at 11:08 am #

    When I saw her quilt, I figured Chickie was an ally or a member, but I know she’s surrounded by people who love her and support her, and that’s all that mattered to me! But I know, sadly, everyone is not so enlightened, so this is a talk we’ll all be having for a long time.

  7. 7
    Mary K. in Rockport October 13, 2016 at 7:14 am #

    That’s standard. They come home, sometimes with laundry or a friend or two, and they sleep. Sometimes they stay up/out all night, then sleep all day. Just wait for Thanksgiving!

  8. 8
    Jeanie October 13, 2016 at 5:43 pm #

    I would have sworn I commented here earlier, but I’m old, you see. Brava to you and Chickie for that wonderful article.

  9. 9
    erma takeda October 13, 2016 at 10:03 pm #

    Bravo, I say. Here’s to Chickie and here’s to you!

  10. 10
    Sandy October 13, 2016 at 11:34 pm #

    Chickadee is an amazing young woman. With her smarts and sense of humor she’s going to make her mark in life.

    Have you and she considered doing a larger book covering the same subject matter? I bet there’s a market out there. Hearing your experiences and Chickadee’s experiences about this journey so far would be very real and might help all sorts of people. Just a thought. You two do riff off of each other :)

  11. 11
    Mom24_4evermom October 14, 2016 at 9:49 am #

    Awesome. Thank you.

  12. 12
    Stephanie Wald October 23, 2016 at 11:12 pm #

    all the (good) feels!

    love this so much!

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