September 30, 2006 | Offspring: ecstasy and agony
Creative ways to cheer on six-year-olds during a soccer game:
“That was a REALLY GREAT KICK! Next time you’ll get the direction right, too!”
“Good hustle! Let’s keep the stealing of the ball from teammates to a minimum, though!”
“That’s okay! Shake it off! Next time try standing somewhere near the goal, since you’re the goalie and all!”
“Spread out so you can pass! Spread out! No, not out of bounds! Just… oh… nevermind.”
“That’s it! Go after the ball! The BALL! Over THERE!”
“GET OUT OF THE POISON IVY!!”
“Everyone who can remember which goal is ours for the entire quarter gets a fruit roll-up!”
Posted by Mir @ 12:23 pm
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My favorite is the first one. Positive and affirming!
September 30th, 2006 at 2:15 pmNiiiiiice!
September 30th, 2006 at 3:29 pmThe scary thing is when you end up using cheers like this at a university soccer game.
September 30th, 2006 at 4:22 pmThese remind me of when my son played catcher in little league. We used to have to tell him to turn around and stop watching the stands! Little guys are so funny!
September 30th, 2006 at 4:27 pmYou forgot a couple.
“You can run faster when you’re not holding hands!” and “Save the karate/dance routine for the sidelines!” and “Yes, I see the airplane! Do YOU see the BALL?”
Pee-wee soccer drove me to drink.
September 30th, 2006 at 5:52 pmLOL!
My oldest got her first (and only) goal scoring into her own goal. She’s an amazing goalie, though.
We, um, missed soccer today. we had no internet and it was a jamboree so I didn’t know the times or places (they changed everything at the last minute).
Having 2 kids in soccer makes me grateful for some of my prescriptions. Except that I can’t drink.
September 30th, 2006 at 7:26 pmLol funny
September 30th, 2006 at 9:02 pmSounds like our morning. Only with girls. After 3 losses, we finally won a game. Trying to give the “Winning Isn’t Everything” speech for a team of 2nd and 3rd grade girls for one more week would have been the one thing that drove me to drink.
September 30th, 2006 at 10:16 pmFUNNY! I got to see my grandson’s first soccer game, & as his parents were stressing that as goalie, he had his back to the field as he swung on the goal (post? cage?) thingy…I could laugh. Kid’s sports are meant to be enjoyed, laughed at, and used for ammo later in their lives.
October 1st, 2006 at 1:17 amOh, my… I’m laughing tears! It’s amazing what you say to children to cheer them up
October 1st, 2006 at 10:17 amHeeee! I like the last one.
October 1st, 2006 at 11:30 amMy daughters hockey games are pretty similar. Amazingly, my son who never seems to hear a word I say about anything is actually really good at soccer. When he plays, he actually knows what he is doing. Somehow even when he is unable to listen to anything I say, he is able to hear every word his coach says, and actually follow his directions. Amazes me every time!
October 1st, 2006 at 11:47 amLOVE the last one! Seems like something someone would have said to me… last week
October 1st, 2006 at 12:37 pmYou forgot my very favorite -
“This is Soccer, not hand ball, so keep your hands down and quit batting the ball when it’s thrown in!”
Soccer is over when?
October 1st, 2006 at 2:24 pm“Take your jersey off your head!! And turn around!”
I know his soccer coach wakes up in the middle of the night screaming, “OTHER WAY, BUDDY! OTHER WAY!!”
October 1st, 2006 at 6:47 pmBwah-hahaha…. I’m so glad soccer is over for the year. I think I’ll probably subject myself to it again next year though…
October 1st, 2006 at 10:30 pmHa! I remember those days! Now I’m yelling, “step up dude, step up!” and “Get in there! It won’t hurt that bad! Get in there!” and “shake it off, shake it off! There’s no crying in soccer!” (not out loud of course)… no more snacks and no more waving at mommy, just sweat and grim determination. Sigh. Mir, I’m a professional lurker on a mission to delurk for the week… I’ll be back!
October 1st, 2006 at 10:32 pm