November 13, 2005 | Haven't been hit by lightning yet!
Do most people have a filter between their brains and their mouths? I was born missing this regulatory device, I think. It is perhaps the sort of thing you can cultivate, but the end result is not the same as a genetic predisposition.
Like, you can have a perm, if your hair is straight. But even the most amazing, most expensive process isn’t going to result in something the same as if you truly have curly hair. At the very least, eventually your hair will grow back (straight) and you’d have to re-perm.
For me, I’ve managed to figure out enough awareness to avoid most painful social situations born of my chronic foot-in-mouth disease. Sometimes I fail miserably, regardless. But then there’s this wonderful thing where I can let all of my warts and dorkitude hang out here and it’s sort of like a steam release valve. For every embarrassing revelation here, my chances of humiliating myself in real life are slightly reduced! Everybody wins!
A normal person would share:
I made this great cinnamon crumb cake thing this week.
Then I go on to add:
I was eating a piece with my tea the next morning, and Chickadee asked me what it was.
“It’s coffee cake,” I replied without really thinking.
“Oh,” she said, looking crushed. “It looks good. Too bad I can’t have any. I’m not old enough for coffee.”
“Yeah, too bad,” I agreed.
A normal person would share:
I wore my beloved Boots of Power to church this morning, for the first time this season. Woo!
Then I go on to add:
I also wore a skirt. Commando. (The boots made me do it.)
A normal person would share:
I really need to make the the time to wallpaper my master bathroom.
Then I go on to add:
The wallpaper to go in there has been sitting in the hall closet for over 4 years. At some point I should just admit that it’s never going to happen.
A normal person would share:
While searching in the garage for larger shoeboxes for Operation Christmas Child, I found my long-MIA rollerblades! Huzzah!
Then I go on to add:
Technically, that’s a lie. I found A rollerblade. Under a stack of stuff. But I couldn’t find the other one. And it stands to reason that the other one is right around there, somewhere, but when I didn’t find it right away I reasoned, “Eh, it’s just gonna snow soon. I’ll find it in the Spring.”
A normal person would share:
Tomorrow marks 3 weeks since Hairgate, and today is the first day since then that I didn’t hate the way my hair looks. It’s finally grown to an acceptable length.
Then I go on to add:
Of course that means the grey is coming back, so I think I’ll dye it again. You know, because it went so well last time. I did have the forethought to go for a lighter shade, at least. Be on the lookout for a post later this week that goes something like this: DAMMIT NOW MY HAIR IS RED! REEEEED! RED LIKE FIRE! CRAP!
A normal person would share:
Yes, I added Google Ads to the site today. Am huge sellout whore, etc. I plan to spend all $.29 of my earnings on fast living.
Then I go on to add:
Here–for me–are the salient points in this development:
A) I named the color scheme “Modified Pot Roast,” because I modified their “Pot Roast” scheme (duh). Who has a color scheme called Pot Roast???
B) I was taking a break from working and trying to come up with something that was marginally work-ish but still allowed me to divert from my task at hand.
C) There is no C; but if there was, I’d be telling you. Because I value our close relationship. Also, my picture appears in the dictionary next to the phrase “nothing is sacred.”
November 13th, 2005 at 11:59 pm
Mmmmm. Pot roast!
November 14th, 2005 at 12:11 am
Modified Pot Roast would be an excellent name for a band.
November 14th, 2005 at 12:51 am
Oh my gawd, you’re my long lost twin sister. I have the same penchant for revealing just a tad more than I should. I don’t have much to hide, but I always add a bit too much information to the mix and I find that exceedingly normal!
Commando to church, eh? Cool!
November 14th, 2005 at 1:35 am
I traded my filter in for a flashy new hat.
November 14th, 2005 at 1:35 am
1. Have you ever posted a pic of the Boots of Power? Because I reallyreally want to see them.
2. What’s wrong with flaming red hair??
3. I didn’t even notice the google ad thing until you pointed it out.
4. Now that you’ve pointed it out, I wonder if they have a color scheme called Gaucamole or Green M & M or Tossed Salad with Ranch. (for me, not for you. heh.)
5. Have you seen that commercial about the guy who is telling the world about his shellfish allergy and his overactive sweat glands and other stuff? (I think maybe it’s for AOL, but I’m not sure because I tend to block out what the ads are actually about, thereby totally defeating the purpose) Anyway, I can’t imagine why I was just thought of that ad, but it just popped into my head. Go figure! :-)
November 14th, 2005 at 9:04 am
Filter? What’s a filter?
Commando to Church! You are one WILD woman. I think you should go for the red hair ON PURPOSE. ;)
November 14th, 2005 at 9:34 am
That is so hott!
November 14th, 2005 at 12:31 pm
I didn’t notice the ad until you pointed it out. Who cares? I hope it makes you filthy rich!
I have to watch my own foot-in-mouth disease. For me, silence is the only thing that works. They talk, I just smile and nod. Boring, but safe.
November 14th, 2005 at 1:03 pm
I can just see you doing the basic instinct leg crossover during sunday school.
November 14th, 2005 at 4:01 pm
I clicked! Have fun with your $.29!
November 15th, 2005 at 8:30 pm
I think it’s more like you like to TALK A LOT, really. I am guilty of the same sort of thing. Silence, do I hear silence? Time to go fill it up with TALK, lots of useful old TALK
November 16th, 2005 at 2:59 am
“… let all of my warts and dorkitude hang out here … .” That is a great phrase. This is my first time on your blog; thank you for making me laugh.
November 16th, 2005 at 10:32 pm
Have you made your 39 cents yet?
I love that you disclose all. You make me feel so normal. Or less alone in my quirkiness.
That’s it, quirkiness.